PG: The PG-13s

Infield: Third baseman Phil Garner (1973-88) was known as “Scrap Iron” because of his hard-nosed approach to the game, which made him immensely popular with the blue-collar fans in Pittsburgh during the prime of his career. He wasn’t a speedster, but he stole as many as 35 bases in a season and had 220 steals in his career. He wasn’t a slugger, but he could hit 30 doubles and 15 home runs in a decent year. He wasn’t a Gold Glover, but he would throw himself in front of those hard shots down the third-base line. On the “We Are Family” Pirates of 1979, he batted .417 in the NLCS and then rapped out 12 hits against Baltimore in the World Series. Shortstop Pumpsie Green (1959-63) is best known for being the first black player on the Boston Red Sox, who were the last MLB team to integrate, 12 years after Jackie Robinson. He was a .250 hitter who didn’t do much else, so he was never much more than a utility infielder, and he retired after spending one year with the 111-loss Mets in 1963. Second baseman Pedro Garcia (1973-77) hit a league-leading 32 doubles for the Brewers in his first season and finished second to Al Bumbry for the AL Rookie of the Year Award. That was by far the best year of his career, and he was done before he turned 30. First baseman Paul Goldschmidt (2011- ) is a young slugger who just came up with Arizona. He never slugged below .600 in the minors. We'll see how that translates in The Show.

Outfield: Right fielder Pedro Guerrero (1978-92), another child of San Pedro de Macoris, was a great hitter and a terrific athlete, though he never got his speed back after tearing up his knee while sliding into third base during a spring training game early in his career. Gurrero was intense, moody and coloful, all of which made him stand out on the buttoned-down roster of the Los Angeles Dodgers. If he hadn’t been playing in Dodger Stadium, a hitter’s nightmare, he may well have won batting titles and MVP awards. He was a bad defensive player and the Dodgers were constantly trying to figure out where he did the least damage – his long oddysey at third base was a hallmark of Tommy Lasorda’s willingness to disregard defense. But the man could hit, and as good as his career stats are – a .300 average, 215 home runs, 898 RBI – they are just a hint of what he might have done if he had stayed healthy, played in a more conducive ballpark, and had the DH available to him. Left fielder Pete Gillespie (1880-87) was a pretty fair hitter, and in his career with the Troy Trojans and the New York Gothams, he played alongside several Hall of Famers, including Roger Connor, Dan Brouthers, Buck Ewing and Tim Keefe. Gillespie was obviously not at their level, but he was a good player for a decade or so. Center fielder Phil Geier (1896-1904) was known as Lilttle Phil – not only was he 5-foot-7, 145 pounds, but he had a face that looked like one of the Our Gang kids in late adolesence. He was a deadball slap hitter.

Catcher: Patsy Gharrity (1916-30) spent his entire career with the Washington Senators. He had some good years with the bat, and Walter Johnson took enough of a liking to him that when he later became a manager, he brought Gharrity on as a coach. Gharrity is the last major-leaguer to use the name Patsy (though it is Tito Francona’s middle name).

Rotation: Pud Galvin (1875-92) was a short, squat, round-faced gentleman whose career record of 365-310 made him baseball’s first 300-game winner and its first 300-game loser. His career totals of 6,003 innings and 646 complete games are both second in the all-time record books behind Cy Young, and it seems unlikely that he will be pushed to third place anytime soon. He was a good, durable pitcher for a long time. Pretzels Getzien (1884-92) – who goes on the all-food team alongside guys like Peanuts Lowery and Pork Chop Pough – was a contemporary of Galvin’s. He had a career record of 145-139, accounting for 72.5 percent of the victories in major-league histories by pitchers born in Germany. Paul Gregory (1932-33) had a brief career with the White Sox, going 9-14 over two seasons, and when he was done he returned to the minors and pitched for another decade, winning 145 games. Paul Giel (1954-61) was a college football star at Minnesota, a two-time All-American at fullback and runner-up in the voting for the 1953 Heisman. He was never a very effective pitcher, working mostly in relief and never totaling 100 innings in a single season. Phil Gallivan (1931-34) won five games in his major-league career, but 105 in the minors. When he was done pitching, he worked as a scout for several teams until his death in 1969.

Bullpen: Closer Paul Gibson (1988-96) was a decent enough lefty with a round face that looked even rounder because of his spectacles. His 11 saves and 4.07 career ERA make him the nominal closer here. Pat Gomez (1993-95) was a lefty who had a short career with the Giants and Padres. He was relatively effective, apart from some control issues. Pete Gebrian (1947) pitched for the White Sox for one year at age 23 but didn’t stick around after that. Paul Gilliford (1967) was known as “Gorilla,” presumably because of his 5-10, 210-pound physique. He was a lefty who pitched in two games for the Orioles. Paul Gehrman (1937) won 100 games in the minors but made just two appearances in the majors. Pat Griffin (1914) made just one appearance. He pitched one inning and gave up three runs. These are the only 11 pitchers in the history of Major League Baseball with the initials PG, so the pitching staff runs a bit short.

Bench: Peaches Graham (1902-12) was a pretty decent backup catcher, so he will probably share time with Gharrity. More important, Peaches Graham joins the all-food team listed above (Pretzels Getzien, Peanuts Lowery and Pork Chop Pough), and if you add in Pickles Dillhofer and Pie Traynor, we’re on our way to an entire team of foodstuffs beginning with the letter “P.” Pete Gray (1945) lost his right arm to a childhood accident involving the tire spokes of a moving truck (you get the picture). During World War II, owner Bill Veeck signed Gray to play outfield for the St. Louis Browns, figuring that the oddity of a one-armed outfielder might draw some fans. Gray appeared in 77 games, batting .218 and making seven errors in the outfield. On the other hand, Gray was a .300 hitter in the minors, so it’s not like Veeck hired him off the streets to act as a one-man freak show, and besides, it’s pretty impressive that a guy with one arm could bat .200 in the majors and make even basic plays and throws from the outfield. We’re right proud to have him on the PG-13s. Phil Gagliano (1963-74) hung around the majors for 12 years as an unremarkable utility man and he played in three World Series with the Cardinals. Pep Goodwin (1914-15) was a utility infielder in the upstart Federal League, and if you were a guy named Claire Goodwin, you’d accept the nickname “Pep,” too. Pete Gilbert (1890-94) was a third baseman who lost his starting job to the teenaged John McGraw in Baltimore. Infielder Pedro Gonzalez (1963-67), the first kid from San Pedro de Macoris to make it to the majors, came up with the Yankees at the tail end of their long dynasty and was a backup on the 1964 pennant winners.

Manager: Preston Gomez finished last for four straight years as manager of the Padres, but after all, they were an expansion team. He had losing records with the Astros and the Cubs as well. He did win a Pacific Coast League title while managing in the Dodgers’ farm system, and he won a league title while managing in his natve Cuba as well. On two separate occasions during his managerial career, he pinch-hit in the eighth inning for a pitcher who was working on a no-hitter - Clay Kirby for San Diego in 1970, and Don Wilson for the Astros in 1974. In both instances, the bullpen lost the no-hitters. (In Gomez's defense, in both instances his team was getting shut out and losing. so pinch-hitting for the pitcher in the eighth inning was sound game strategy - but he lost both games, and blowing the no-hitters didn't help things.)

PH: The Phil Harrises

Infield: Paul Hines (1872-91) was really a center fielder, but he played a bit of second base, too, and the PH team needs him in the middle infield. Hines was a fascinating cat. He may have been baseball’s first triple crown winner, though he was not initially credited with winning the batting title in 1878. He may have turned the first unassisted triple play, though that interpretation depends on whether a runner was called out for passing another runner on the play, and it’s not quite clear what actually transpired. He may or may not have caught a ball dropped from the top of the Washington Monument. He lost his hearing after getting beaned in 1886 and spent the rest of his life deaf. While playing in Washington, he became friends with President McKinley, which led to a government job after his playing career was done. First baseman Pancho Herrera (1958-61) was a big, strapping Cuban who played in the Negro Leagues and in Mexico in addition to his long career in the majors and minors. He hit more than 200 home runs in the minors, leading the International League three times. He was the Philadelphia Phillies’ regular first baseman for two years. Third baseman Pinky Higgins (1930-46) batted .290 and was good for 30 doubles and a dozen homers per year. He once had hits in 12 consecutive at-bats, with two walks mixed in. He drove in 1,000 runs in his career and later managed (and general managed) the Red Sox. He did two months in prison for negligent homicide when he ran over and killed a highway worker while driving drunk. Shortstop Paul Hinson (1928) made three appearances as a pinch-runner for the Red Sox. He scored one run. His incomplete minor-league records show him as a .295 hitter, for whatever that’s worth.

Outfield: Right fielder Pete Hill was a left-handed line drive hitter in the early years of the 20th Century and is considered to be one of the greatest outfielders in Negro League history – not quite at the level of Oscar Charleston and Cristobal Torriente, but in the next level below them. Played on some of the greatest teams of his era and was often the biggest star on the team. Left fielder Paul Householder (1980-87) came up with the Reds at a time when the team was putting players’ names on the backs of their uniforms in extremely large letters. Householder’s 11-letter surname was so big that it almost formed a complete circle surrounding his number. That was, in all honesty, the most memorable thing about his career. Center fielder Pete Hotaling (1879-88) was a solid hitter and a good outfielder with a lot of range.

Catcher: Pinky Hargrave (1923-33) was a solid catcher for several different teams. His real name was William McKinley Hargrave, which means that two players on the PH team are connected to President William McKinley. It is worth noting that there have been two players named Hargrave in major league history, that both were catchers, and that one was named Pinky and the other was named Bubbles.

Rotation: Pat Hentgen (1991-2004) won 20 games and the AL Cy Young Award in 1996. He was a durable pitcher who won 131 games in his career, mostly for the Blue Jays. Pete Harnisch (1988-2001) is probably the only pitcher in major league history to go on the disabled list with depression and anxiety sparked by withdrawal after giving up chewing tobacco. He was a decent enough pitcher, won 111 games in his career. Pink Hawley (1892-1901) was a 19th-century workhorse who in 1895 pitched 444 innings and won 31 games. He finished his career with a record of 167-179. Though many ballplayers have been nicknamed Pinky, Hawley is unique in that “Pink” was actually his given name (Eugene Pink Hawley). Pete Henning (1914-15) went 14-25 in two seasons with the Kansas City Packers in the Federal League. Preston Hanna (1975-82) was a first-round draft pick of the Atlanta Braves who reached the majors in his early 20s and pitched badly until arm injuries ended his career by age 28.

Bullpen: Phil Hennigan (1969-73) starts out as the closer, largely on the basis of his 25 career saves, though his single-season high of 14 came in a year when his ERA was 4.94. Setup man Philip Hughes (2007- ) is a young arm with the Yankees who won 18 games in 2010. He will most likely be good enough to either move into the rotation. Philip Humber (2006- ) went from the Mets to the Twins as part of the Johan Santana deal, but he has only now started to perform well in the majors. Pep Harris (1996-98) was a strike-year replacement player who eventually won over his Angels teammates but never was accepted into the players’ union. He pitched well before arm injuries ended his career at age 26. Phil Haugstad (1947-52) was a minor-league star who pitched occasionally for the “Boys of Summer” Dodgers, arriving on the scene during Jackie Robinson’s rookie year. He never appeared in a postseason game, and if he ever did anything of note, it escaped the attention of the many people who have chronicled the Dodgers of the late 1940s and ‘50s. Pat House (1967-68) had a career ERA of 7.08, and considering that he did that in 1967 and ’68, he must have been pitching very badly indeed. Give the man credit – it takes a unique talent to give up 17 runs in 20 innings despite allowing no home runs and only six walks (half of them intentional). He pitched at Boise State University, where we hope they have a blue diamond. Phil Huffman (1979-85) had the misfortune, at age 21, of being hurled onto the pyre of the rotation of the 1979 Blue Jays and left to roast there as he put up a 6-18 record and a 5.77 ERA. The emotionally scarred young man went back to the minors for a few years, and then got kicked around in a brief call-up with the Orioles in 1985.

Bench: Phil Hiatt (1993-2001) is a utility guy who hit 342 minor-league home runs but was never able to put it together into any kind of major-league success. Likewise, outfielder Pat Howell (1992) played more than 1,100 games in the minors but never made a dent in the bigs. Backup catcher Paul Hoover (2001- ) also played 1,000 games in the minors, and he has been just as ineffective in the majors. Pedro Hernandez (1979-82) was an infielder who never did anything in the majors or the minors. Paul Hodgson (1980) is a French-Canadian outfielder who batted .220 for the 1980 Blue Jays.

Manager: Pinky Higgins will serve as player-manager.

PM: The Pete Michauds

Infield: Hall of Famer Paul Molitor (1978-98) came up as a second baseman, shifted to third for the prime of his career, then finished at first, all the while playing a lot of DH – not because he was a poor fielder, but more as a way to keep him healthy. He’s a first baseman on this team. He put up some fine numbers – 3,315 hits, including 605 doubles and 234 home runs, 504 steals, more than 1,300 RBI and almost 1,800 runs scored. In 29 postseason games, he batted .368 (on-base .435, slugging .615). A nice guy who had a 39-game hitting streak in 1987 and drove reporters nuts because his quiet, humble demeanor did not make for good daily copy. Pinky May (1939-43), father of Milt the catcher, was a solid third baseman for the Phillies whose playing career ended after his Navy service during World War II. Shortstop Pat Meares (1993-2001) was a decent fielder with a little pop. Pete Mackanin (1973-81) was a second baseman who hit 12 home runs in 1975 but never produced enough to hold down a regular starting job for long.

Outfielder: Center fielder Pepper Martin (1928-44), known as The Wild Horse of the Osage, was a hustling firebrand who was one of the key figures on the hard-playing, hard-living Gashouse Gang Cardinals teams. He played on two championship teams, batting .418 in 15 World Series games. Baseball historian Lee Allen described Martin as an “unshaven hobo who ran the bases like a berserk locomotive, slept in the raw and cursed at pitchers in his sleep.” Right fielder Pat Mullin (1940-53) was a good hitter who missed four prime years due to World War II. Left fielder Pedro Munoz (1990-96) would hit 12-15 home runs in a good year.

Catcher: Phil Masi (1939-52) was a respectable catcher for the Braves and the White Sox. He played in three all-star games.

Rotation: At his peak, Pedro Martinez (1992-2009) may have been the most dominant pitcher of all time. In 2000, for example, his ERA was 1.74 while the league average was (ahem) 4.92. He was always a good pitcher, but for a seven-year stretch in mid-career he was insanely good, blowing hitters away and keeping them off-balance so effectively that it seemed like scoring a run off of him was a major accomplishment. For his career he went 219-100 with an ERA below 3.00. He cruised past 3,000 strikeouts, averaging 10 per 9 innings over the course of his career. But his legend, which put him in the Hall of Fame, is that stretch between 1997-2003 when he was as great as any pitcher who ever stood on a mound. Pat Malone (1928-37) won 134 games, including a pair of 20-win seasons for the Cubs. Paul Maholm (2005-14) was a fairly good pitcher for some bad Pirates teams. He finished at 77-100, but he was probably a little better than that record indicates on its own. Paul Moskau (1977-83) was a swing man on the post-Machine teams in Cincinnati. Paul Minner (1946-56) was a lefty on some bad Cubs teams.

Bullpen: Closer Pete Mikkelsen (1964-72) came up with the Yankees at the end of their dynasty and then had some good years bouncing around the National League. Peter Moylan (2006- ) is an Australian import who had some fine years in Atlanta. He's got a slinging sidearm delivery and a cheeky sense of humor that the fans enjoy. Had his second Tommy John Surgery in his mid-30s and spent his off-year working as a coach in the Braves minor-league system. Still slinging as he approaches 40. Pat Mahomes (1992-2003) had a couple of good years, but not many. He earned an estimated $2.6 million in his career, which ain't but, but his son Patrick will get a bigger bonus than that when he signs his contract with the NFL's Kansas City Chiefs, who took him with the 10th pick in the 2017 draft. Pedro A. Martinez (1993-97) was a useful lefty reliever who was always referred to with his middle initial so as not to confuse him with the real Pedro Martinez. Paul Mirabella (1978-90) was a hot prospect who went to the Yankees in a 10-player trade that involved Sparky Lyle, Dave Righetti and Juan Beniquez. He went 0-4 for the Yankees, and they shipped him to Toronto in a six-player deal that involved Chris Chambliss and Rick Cerone. He hung around the American League for more than a decade as one of those lefties who is just good enough to earn an invite to spring training. Peter Munro (1999-2004) was a hot Red Sox prospect who got traded to Toronto and never did much. Phonney Martin (1872-73) was a combination outfielder-pitcher who wasn’t very good at either, but his versatility earns him a roster spot (plus, we like a guy named Alphonse who answers to Phonney).

Bench: Pepe Mangual (1972-77) was a speedy outfielder, the brother of Angel Mangual and the cousin of Coco Laboy. Phil Mankowski (1976-82) was a third baseman who never hit enough. Paul McNulty (1922-27) was a backup outfielder who batted .290 at a time when everyone was batting .290. Backup catcher Pat Moran (1901-14), who won a World Series with the Chicago Cubs (so you know he’s long dead). Patsy McGaffigan (1917-18) is a middle infielder with a .194 batting average.

Manager: With all due respect to Pat Moran, who had a fine managerial career and led the 1919 Reds to the World Series title over the tanking Black Sox, we’re turning this team over to Pinky May for sentimental reasons. He won more than 1,600 games as a minor-league manager, including two years with the hometown Peninsula Pilots.

PR: The Phillip Roths

Infield: Two longtime rivals become teammates here. Pee Wee Reese (1940-58) was a Hall of Fame shortstop, but he’ll move to third base on this team (he actually played 115 games there for the Dodgers near the end of his career). He makes the move to accommodate his contemporary, Yankees shortstop Phil Rizzuto (1941-56). Reese was the better player, but Rizzuto had the better glove, and with the two of them on the left side of the infield, not much will get through. People often discussed them as though they were interchangable - diminutive New York shortstops of the same era - and that tendency grew even stronger after they retired. But the truth is, Reese had 126 home runs and 232 steals, while Rizzuto had just 38 home runs and 149 steals. Reese scored 1,338 runs and drove in 885, while Rizzuto had 877 runs and 563 RBI. Reese was the better player, but Rizzuto was very fine as well, winning the MVP in 1950. Reese was the highly respected captain of the "Boys of Summer" Dodgers and a key player in the Jackie Robinson story, and Rizzuto was very popular with teammates as well. Reese played on seven pennant winners and one World Series champion, and Rizzuto played on nine pennant winners and seven World Series champions. All seven times that Reese's Dodgers played in the World Series, the opponent was Rizzuto's Yankees. (Oddly enough, Reese might end up batting cleanup in this batting order - the roster is full of leadoff hitters with no middle-of-the-order types.) First baseman Pete Runnels (1951-64) hit .300 six times, won two batting titles, drew a lot of walks and played defense well enough that he also spent considerable time at second and short. Pokey Reese (1997-2004) didn’t hit much, but he stole 144 bases and whacked the occasional double, and he won two Gold Gloves, making this one slick defensive group.

Outfield: Pete Rose (1963-86) could honestly start on this team anywhere but short or catcher. We’ll slide him into the left field spot because that’s where he’ll be the most useful. You know Pete Rose’s story – 4,256 hits (first all-time) and 2,165 runs (third all-time), a half-dozen pennants, three world championships and the guts of the Big Red Machine. A lifetime ban for gambling, federal incarceration as a tax cheat, and an unapologetic manner that has come to be accepted as the ugly “flip side” of the admirable competitive fire he showed on the field. Center fielder Pete Reiser (1940-52) was an electrifying talent with eye-popping speed and a live bat, but his career was derailed by a string of injuries, many of which were caused by his habit of running headlong into outfield walls while chasing fly balls. Stretchers were his constant companion. On one occasion he fractured his skull, and on another he was given Last Rites on the field in case he died. Leo Durocher, who managed them both, said Reiser was as talented as Willie Mays but that he had “everything but luck.” Right fielder Paul Revere Radford (1883-94), a 5-foot-6 guy who hit .242 and drew a lot of walks, was nowhere near as interesting as Rose and Reiser.

Catcher: Phil Roof (1961-77) was a backup for most of his career, and he hung around long enough to have played for both the Milwaukee Braves and the Toronto Blue Jays. He retired at age 37, and four years later, Gene Roof made it to the majors. We all assumed it was his son – but no, it was his brother, 17 years younger.

Rotation: Preacher Roe (1938-54) threw a great spitball. Yes, yes, the pitch had been banned for almost 20 years before he arrived. But he still threw a hella good one. He went 127-84 and pitched in three World Series as Reese's teammate on the “Boys of Summer” Dodgers, but he didn’t last long enough to be part of the 1955 championship. Pete Redfern (1976-82) was a nondescript righty for the Twins. Pat Rapp (1992-2001) and Pat Ragan (1909-23) were average pitchers on some below-average teams. Actually, Pedro Ramos (1955-70) fits that description pretty well, too.

Bullpen: Closer Phil Regan (1960-72) had a brilliant year in 1966 and a few other good years along the way. He was known as “The Vulture,” an inside joke among pitchers. Pete Richert (1962-74) was a fireballer who had good years in the 1960s and ‘70s and could also get some work in the closer role. Paul Reuschel (1975-78) looked like his brother Rick - portly and sort of geeky looking - but didn’t pitch nearly as well. Paul Rigdon (2000-01) wasn’t very good. Pep Rambert (1939-40) was not as good as Rigdon. Pete Rambo (1926) and Phil Redding (1912-13) will get mop-up work.

Bench: Paul Ratliff (1963-72) is the backup catcher. Paul Runge (1981-88) was a utility infielder for the Braves who became a minor-league manager. Prentice Redman (2003), brother of Tike, gets a backup outfield job here because there isn’t anyone that much better and because of his distinguished association with the hometown Norfolk Tides. Phil Reccius (1882-90) was a versatile third baseman who could also pitch a bit, which will come in very handy considering the back end of this team’s bullpen. Pop Rising (1905) batted .103. His real name was Percival Sumner Rising. If he played in the 1980s, Chris Berman would have called him (What Time is) Pop Rising.

Manager: Paul Richards managed the White Sox and the Orioles for a dozen years, and some of his teams were pretty good. He had some old-fashioned ideas that didn't jibe real well with the contemporary game, but his overall record is decent enough.

PS: The Phil Silverses

Infield: Third baseman Pablo Sandoval (2008- ) got called up to the Giants at midseason in 2008, at age 21, and he batted .345 in 145 at-bats. Of course, everyone knew the kid couldn’t put up that kind of batting average over the course of a full season, and in 2009 he proved it – given a full season at age 22, he only batted .330. With, uh, 45 doubles, 25 homers and, perhaps most impressive, 52 walks (coming from a guy who swung at just about everything as a rookie). He’s 5-foot-11, 245 pounds, he’s known as “Kung Fu Panda,” and he's great fun to watch. First baseman Paul Smith (1953-58) is every bit as exciting as his name suggests – a .270 hitter who walks a bit, bunts well and has no power or speed. You don’t see a lot of 5-foot-8 first basemen. Second baseman Pete “Pecky” Suder (1941-55) spent his whole career with the A’s, mostly in Philly but spending his last year in Kansas City. He was a sure-handed fielder but not much of a hitter – a rather empty .249 career batting average. Shortstop Pop Smith (1880-91) batted .222 with no walks and no power. He stole a lot of bases, but then, he played when you got a stolen base for going from first to third on a single. Not to be confused with Pop-Boy Smith, who was a different, apparently unrelated (though they both had the first name Charles) player from a generation later.

Outfield: Left fielder Pat Seerey (1943-49) was known as “Fat Pat,” but don’t let that fool you. Well, yeah, he was a bit on the large side. But he turned that into power – 86 career homers in 1,815 at-bats, and four home runs in one memorable game against the Philadelphia A’s in 1948. He was a .224 hitter who led the league in strikeouts four times despite never playing 130 games in a single season, but he hit home runs and played a decent defense – sort of an early model of Gorman Thomas or Rob Deer. Right fielder Pat Sheridan (1981-91) was a role player who had five seasons with 100-plus games (and another with 98) but who had only one year in which he qualified for the batting title. A career .253 hitter who worked hard. Center fielder Paul Strand (1913-24) batted 227 times in the majors and hit .224 with four walks. On the other hand, he played in the minors until he was 34, batting .334 with power, so he must have had something going on.

Catcher: Pop Snyder (1873-91) didn’t hit much -- .235, to be precise – but he came up at age 18 and struck around until he was 36.

Rotation: Lefty Paul Splittorff (1970-84) spent his whole career with the Royals, arriving two years after their arrival in the ’68 expansion and retiring one year before their World Series title in ’85. In between he won 166 games (the most in franchise history) and was a fine, durable, consistent pitcher. Pete Schourek (1991-2001), another lefty, went 18-7 for Cincinnati in 1995. Other than that season, his career high was eight victories. Pete Smith (1987-98) pitched for some terrible teams, and as a result he finished his career with 47 victories to go with 71 losses. He came up young, got injured often, but in 1992 managed to start 11 games for Atlanta and go 7-0 with a 2.05 ERA. Pete Schneider (1914-19) won 14, 10 and 20 games in the years between 1915-17, but he lost 19 in each of those seasons. Finished his career 59-86, mostly with the Reds, but left before the championship season of 1919. Phenomenal Smith (1884-91) wasn’t all that phenomenal (54-74 lifetime) and he wasn’t really Smith (born John Gammon), but he played under the name John Francis Smith and got the nickname after striking out 16 in a game in a minor-league game in 1885. He had some good seasons, and he was later Christy Mathewson’s minor-league manager.

Bullpen: Closer Paul Shuey (1994-2007) was a big righty who was a key component in the very good Cleveland pens during the mid- to late-1990s. Never a full-time closer, but filled in occasionally and did well. Paul Spoljaric (1994-2000) was a big lefty who had a couple of good seasons in Toronto and then started getting knocked around. He stuck around past his expiration date, as lefties often do. He pitched for his native Canada in the 2004 Olympics and is still pitching in Canadian independent leagues as he approaches 40. Pete Sivess (1936-38) went 7-11 for the Phillies, which is what tends to happen when you walk twice as many as you strike out. Paul Siebert (1974-78) was a lefty who was out of baseball by age 26 because of injuries, but he, too, walked more than he struck out, so he was never destined to have a long career. Pat Simmons (1928-29) had a fine rookie season as a 19-year-old reliever with the last-place Red Sox, and then he just disappeared – losing record in the minors, and out of organized ball by age 24. Pete Standridge (1911-15) had a couple of 20-win seasons in the Class-D Western Canada League, and another in the Pacific Coast League, but he didn’t do much in the majors (though he was one of the first pitchers to develop a forkball). Paul Schreiber (1922-45) pitched 20 innings, walked 10, struck out five, had no career decisions. And, no, he didn’t pitch 23 seasons. He pitched in parts of two, then was brought back at age 42 to work a couple of innings during World War II. He did win 100 games in the minors.

Bench: Paul Schaal (1964-74) was the Royals third baseman before George Brett. A useful player, actually, a .244 hitter but with a lot of walks. Outfielder Pete Scott (1926-28) had a .303 lifetime average, and in 522 at-bats spread over two seasons with the Cubs and one with the Pirates, he had 41 doubles, 59 walks, 95 runs and 88 RBI. He played in the Pacific Coast League until he was 35, and he was a consistent .320 hitter in more than 1,000 minor-league games. Why he never stuck in the majors is not explained. Outfielder Phil Stephenson (1989-92) spent some time with the Padres and batted .201. Pop Schriver (1886-1901) is another 19th-century catcher, and therefore a fine backup to Pop Snyder. Paul Sentell (1906-07) is a backup outfielder and infielder. He left no thumbprint in the majors, but he hung around the minors until he was almost 40 and collected 1,200 hits.

Manager: Pop Snyder, this team’s player-manager, played that same role for the Cincinnati Red Stockings in the early 1880s, winning the American Association pennant in ’82. It gives sort of a Damon Runyan touch to have a manager named Pop.

PW: The Paul Whites

Infield: First off, let’s begin by stating the obvious. It’s cool to have an infield that includes a Piggy, a Pinky and a Pee Wee. Third baseman Pinky Whitney (1928-39) was a pretty average player, but he played in the Baker Bowl during a great era for hitters, so his numbers look better than they actually are. In 1930, he batted .342 with 41 doubles and was actually a below-average player (as measured by the OPS+ stat, which puts offensive contributions into context including ballpark factor and league averages). That’s pretty much who this guy is – a career .295 hitter who was essentially an average offensive player. Shortstop Pee-Wee Wanninger (1925-27) had a long career in the minors that was interrupted by a brief stopover in the majors. He was the starting shortstop for the 1925 Yankees, and right about now you’re thinking, “Wow, that’s Gehrig and Ruth, must have been a great team,” but no. That was the year that Babe Ruth had his infamous “bellyache,” and the Yankees had their only losing season between 1919-1965. (Odd detail: When Wanninger started at shortstop, it ended the consecutive game streak of Everett Scott at 1,307, which was the record at the time. Later that season, Wanninger was removed for a pinch-hitter – a fellow named Lou Gehrig, in the first of his 2,130 consecutive games that would obliterate Scott’s record.) Second baseman Piggy Ward (1883-94) is the only hitter ever to reach base safely eight times in a nine-inning game – two hits, five walks and a hit-by-pitch on June 18, 1893. This was in the middle of his record streak of reaching base on 19 consecutive plate appearances. He started the streak as a member of the Baltimore Orioles, was traded in the middle of it (go figure) and finished it as a member of the Cincinnati Reds. This was, quite obviously, the highlight of a career that has otherwise been completely forgotten. First baseman Perry Werden (1884-97) was nicknamed “Moose,” because he was 6-foot-2 and 220 pounds in the 1880s. (If your name was Percival Wheritt Werden, you’d be right happy to answer to “Moose.”) Werden was a big star in the minors – batting .341 in a career of more than 1,500 games – and had a pretty decent major-league career as well. In the majors, he batted .282 and drove the ball all over the field, leading the National League in triples twice.

Outfield: Paul Waner (1926-44) was one of the great right fielders of all time. His 3,152 career hits included more than 600 doubles and almost 200 triples, leading to 1,600 runs and 1,300 RBI. He was an absolutely sensational all-around player, rivaling Clemente as the greatest outfielder in Pittsburgh Pirates history. (Waner was known to drink quite a bit, and one writer once observed that “Waner, when he was sober,” was the best outfielder the Pirates ever hard, and that “Waner, when drunk” was the second best.) Though he only weighed 153 pounds, he was known as “Big Poison” – “Big” because he was bigger than his brother, Lloyd “Little Poison” Waner, and “Poison” because that’s how a fan from Brooklyn sounded when he referred to the two Pirates stars as “that big person and that little person.” Center fielder Preston Wilson (1998-2007) was the prototypical slugger of his era, a .260 hitter who struck out a bunch and hit a lot of home runs. He is both the nephew and the stepson of Mookie Wilson (because Mookie married his brother’s ex-wife). He had 189 career home runs, highlighted by a year in the thin air of Colorado when he hit 36 big flies and led the league with 141 RBI. Left fielder Pete Ward (1962-70) was primarily a third baseman, but he played plenty of outfield as well. He was a .254 hitter who was good for about 15 home runs a year, in an era when those were pretty good numbers. He was known for his odd batting stance, a low crouch with the toes of his front foot pointed straight out at the pitcher.

Catcher: Parke Wilson (1893-99) spent most of his career with the New York Giants. In the formative years of baseball protocol, Wilson disdained the emergent use of finger signals in calling pitches. He preferred to use a system of winks and glances to tell the pitcher what to throw.

Rotation: Paul Wilson (1996-2005) won something like 250 games in his major-league career, and he struck out something like 3,000 batters. Oh, wait, no he didn’t. That’s what he was expected to do when he was the No. 1 overall pick in the 1994 draft and the crown jewel of the Mets’ highly touted “Young Guns” rotation (along with Bill Pulsipher and Jason Isringhausen). As a young pitcher, Wilson sure looked like he was going to be as good as billed, but the injuries set in, and he fell off the map for three years in his mid-20s. He ended up posting six losing records in seven seasons, a 40-58 career record. Paul Wagner (1992-99) played for bad teams and, as a result, put up bad records – 29-45 for his career. Pinky Woods (1943-45) was a career minor-leaguer who filled in for the Red Sox during World War II. Pete Wood (1885-89) went 8-15 for the Buffalo Bison in 1885 at age 18, then spent the rest of his career in the minors save for a handful of games for Philadelphia in 1889. Pop Williams (1898-1903), pride of Bowdoinham, Maine, went 16-25 while pitching for four teams in three seasons.

Bullpen: Pete Walker (1995-2006) logged 1,000 innings in the minors to go along with his 339 in the bigs. He was a decent reliever into his mid-30s, and he’ll start out as the de facto closer here. Pete Wilson (1908-09) was a lefty who spent parts of a couple of seasons with the Yankees. Pete Wojey (1954-57), whose real last name was Wojciechowski, won 120 games in the minors before he got the chance to pitch in the bigs for a few years in his mid-30s. When he was done, he went back to the minors and continued to pitch until he was 40. P.J. Walters (2009- ) is a young reliever with a live arm who is trying to get started with the Cardinals, but so far he has done nothing of note in the majors. His full name is Phillip Dewayne Walters, which for some reason is shortened to P.J. Pat Whitaker (1888-89) pitched in three games and had a 2-1 career record. Paul Wilmet (1989) spent a decade in the minors and appeared in just two games in the majors, with a career ERA of 15.43. Paul Wachtel (1917) pitched twice in relief for Brooklyn in 1917, but forget about that and focus, instead, on his 312 minor-league victories, including six 20-win seasons for Fort Worth in the Texas League. Back in the day when the minors were free-standing, competitive entities, not subsidiaries to the big-league teams, this guy was quite a stud. We’re guessing he’ll break into the PW rotation before too long, and he might just be the ace (depending on how Paul Wilson’s arm is feeling).

Bench: In a famous scene in “The Princess Bride,” a crone played by Carol Kane chases a miracle man played by Billy Crystal around their home, taunting him with shouts of “Humperdinck! Humperdinck, Humperdinck, Humperdinck!” There once was a fan who suggested that every baseball team should have at least one player on the roster whose last name sounds funny when shouted three times loudly in “Humperdinck” fashion. A player like backup catcher Pete Weckbecker (1889-90). Whenever he enters the game, the fans will shout “Weckbecker! Weckbecker, Weckbecker, Weckbecker!” Phil Weintraub (1933-45) was a pretty fair hitter, and he’ll get his share of playing time when Pete Ward sits, or when Ward moves to third to spell Pinky Whitney. In one game in 1944, Weintraub drove in 11 runs, missing the major league record by one. First baseman Preston Ward (1948-59) bounced around the majors for nine years. Phil Wisner (1895) went 0-for-1 in his big-league career. Outfielder Possum Whitted (1912-22) was a .270 hitter who could run a bit. When he is in the starting lineup, it will be noted that the team is "playing Possum."

Manager: Pete Ward, who managed in the minors and coaches briefly in the majors, will be player-manager (assuming he can work out the contract details with owner Phil Wrigley).

RB: The Ruben Bladeses

Infield: Shortstop Rick Burleson (1974-87) was sort of like a force of nature, a 165-pound ball of fire known as the Rooster (or, in Boston, as the Roostah). He was a fantastic defensive shortstop, maybe the best in baseball for a few years, and a player so intense that teammates were almost afraid to let up on the field lest they incur his wrath. He arrived around the same time as Rice, Lynn and Evans, helping to transform the Red Sox into a top-notch team. He was never more than an adequate hitter - .270 with a few walks, a few doubles - but he was defensive glue and a team leader. Arm injuries largely derailed his career in his 30s. First baseman Russell Branyan (1998- ) is sort of the opposite of Burleson, a big strapping guy who blasts home runs in great bunches but doesn't do much else. He hit more than 200 in the minors, and he may well top that number in the bigs, too. He's a .230 hitter who doesn't run well or field well, but the home runs are a definite plus. Third baseman Ray Boone (1948-60) is the patriarch of a great baseball family, father of Bob, granddad of Bret and Aaron, and he was probably the best player of the whole bloodline. He batted .275 with more walks than strikeouts, would hit 20 homers per year and topped 100 RBI twice. Second baseman Ross Barnes (1871-81) was without question a great player, as hard as that is to define in the 1870s. He was constantly leading the league in batting average, slugging and on-base, hits, runs, doubles, you name it. He frequently batted .400, but the rules at the time rather favored the hitter. One in particular that Barnes took advantage of - if the ball landed in fair territory, it was a fair ball, no matter where it rolled. He perfected a technique of bunting the ball fair with enough spin to make it skitter far enough into foul territory that it was impossible to throw him out. So he was a good player, but how to compare him to great players of future generations is hard to determine. It was a different game.

Outfield: It's too soon to try and predict what left fielder Ryan Braun (2007- ) is going to do in his career. He is just now hitting his prime, and he has been outstanding since the moment he arrived on the scene. He's a .300 hitter with power and improving strike zone judgment. The guy might hit 500 home runs. Or he might not. But for now, he's a hell of a good hitter. If you want an example of why you can't assume what course a young player's career will take, look to center fielder Rocco Baldelli (2003-10), who arrived at age 21 as a top-flight defensive center fielder, a fleet baserunner and a line-drive hitter with gap power. But then it all went crazy. He missed the entire 2005 season with a torn ACL and Tommy John Surgery, but when he made it back in June 2006, he looked as good as ever, and he batted .300 for the season. But in 2007, he injured a hamstring and then he kept reaggravating it during the rehab process, and he lost most of the 2007 and '08 seasons to an accumulation of injuries that ultimately led to a diagnosis of some sort of mitochondrial disorder or something called channelopathy. We don't really know what that means medically, but we know what it means athletically - he is highly susceptible to injuries, muscle strains and fatigue, and he basically can't play on back-to-back days. He stuck around for a few years and contributed as a role player, but his chance at stardom essentially evaporated before he turned 25. Right fielder Ray Blades (1922-32) spent a decade as a very efficient role player for the Cardinals, batting .300 with gap power and with more walks than strikeouts. He was a good bunter and he got hit by pitches. His career on-base percentage was .395, and he was on four pennant-winning teams and two World Series champions.

Catcher: Roger Bresnahan (1897-1915) is credited with inventing shin guards, which made him extremely durable and changed the nature of the catching position. He was famous for catching Christy Mathewson and was known as one of the most intense, fiery players of his era. He was the first catcher inducted into the Hall of Fame. A .279 hitter who drew walks, banged doubles, stole bases and played like a house afire. A very fine player.

Rotation: Ray Brown was a Negro League star in the generation immediately before the color line came down. He was a key pitcher for the Homestead Grays during that team's heyday. Brown was known for his spectacular curveball, and he was a good enough hitter to play the outfield occasionally when he wasn't on the mound. He was elected to the Hall of Fame in Cooperstown. Rube Benton (1910-25) was a solid lefty who won 150 games. He was a drinker and a gambler, and he was implicated in the aftermath of the Black Sox scandal and at one point was ruled ineligible to play. He admitted to betting on games but denied any involvement in the Black Sox scandal or any suggestion of thrown games. He was ultimately reinstated and finished his career, but there was always a cloud of suspicion over him. Ray Benge (1925-38) was a durable pitcher for teams that were generally pretty bad, leading to a career record of 101-130. Ralph Branca (1944-56) was a good pitcher for the "Boys of Summer" Brooklyn Dodgers, most famous of course for giving up Bobby Thomson's "Shot Heard 'Round the World." Branca pitched for very good teams, alongside great teammates, and had a career record of 88-68, but he left Brooklyn (via waivers) in the middle of the 1953 season, thus missing the big payoff to the Dodgers' great success story. Ron Bryant (1967-75) was a non-descript lefty who out of nowhere in mid-career went 14-7 in 1972 and then 24-12 in 1973 for the Giants. During spring training the next season, he injured himself when he fell off a slide at the hotel swimming pool (no, we're not making that up), requiring 25 stitches and a stint on the disabled list. He went from 24-12 and a 3.53 ERA in 1972 to a 3-15 record and a 5.61 ERA in '73, which probably made him wish he had stayed off that slide. In 1975 he got the holy crap kicked out of him in a few games for St. Louis, and that was the end of his career.

Bullpen: Rod Beck (1991-2004) was a big, burly guy with a good fastball and fine control but a propensity for the gopher ball. He was a durable closer who saved 286 games. Ricky Bottalico (1994-2005) was groomed by the Phillies as a closer, then came up and had a couple of decent years in that role. He was never a great closer, but he wasn't bad, and he had some decent seasons in middle relief as well. Ray Burris (1973-87) won 108 games but can't quite crack this rotation. He's just as good as Ron Bryant and Ray Benge really, but for now he gets bumped to the bullpen and a swingman role. Rocky Biddle (2000-04) spent a couple of years as the Expos' closer. He wasn't very good in that role, but they stuck with him until his ERA was getting close to 7.00. Rigo Beltran (1997-2004) was a lefty setup guy who pitched for four teams. Rafael Betancourt (2003- ) has been a quietly effective reliever for Cleveland, and he even got people out in Colorado after he was traded to the Rockies in the middle of the 2009 season. Rube Bressler (1914-32) came up as a pitcher, had some decent years and some rough years, and when the lively ball arrived, he moved to the outfield and became a .300 hitter. He'll work out of the bullpen and also see some time in the outfield on this team.

Bench: In addition to Bressler, Randy Bush (1982-93) is a backup outfielder here. He was a functional player on two Minnesota Twins championship teams. Rich Becker (1993-2000) came along after Bush, filling the Twins' need for an outfielder with the initials R.B. Infielder Rafael Belliard (1982-98) was about as bad a hitter as a guy can be and still sustain a career. He was (obviously) a fine defensive shortstop who played in four World Series with the Braves. Backup catcher Rod Barajas (1999- ) hits some home runs but doesn't do much else. First baseman Rico Brogna (1992-2001) wasn't terrible, but he wasn't nearly as good as he was expected to be. One night in the Norfolk Tides press box, the radio station's trivia question was which player once hit home runs for four different teams in the same season. The answer, of course, is Dave Kingman. But the first caller hopefully suggested "Rico Brogna?" It struck everyone as so utterly ludicrous that it became a running joke: No matter what the trivia question was, whether it pertained to Cy Young Award winners or World Series heroes from the 1920s or anything else, someone would chime in "Rico Brogna?" You've got to love inside jokes.

Manager: Ray Blades is player-manager. He won more than 900 games as a minor-league manager and in 1939 he managed the Cardinals to 92 wins.

RC: The Rocky Cherrys

Infield: First baseman Roger Connor (1880-1897) isn’t a household name, but he was one hell of a hitter. Batted .317 for his career, and he held the career record for home runs (138) before Mr. Ruth surpassed and obliterated it. Third baseman Ron Cey (1971-87) was often overshadowed by his Dodgers teammates, but he was as good as any of them. He hit 316 home runs, drove in 1,139 runs and was a solid defensive player despite the stubby little legs that earned him the nickname “Penguin.” Ray Chapman (1912-20) quite likely would have made the Hall of Fame if he hadn’t been killed by a fastball to the temple at age 29. (His death had a profound impact on the game – it led to a stricter ban on spitballs and other “doctored” pitches, as well as the practice of keeping clean, white baseballs in the game, helping to usher in the “lively ball” era.) Second baseman Rod Carew (1967-85) won seven batting titles and finished with 3,053 hits and a career average of .328. He was a methodical, consistent player who took his job seriously and put up his numbers every year.

Outfield: Right fielder Roberto Clemente (1955-72) was an electrifying player who won four batting titles, 10 Gold Gloves and an MVP. He helped open the door to future generations of Latin American players, to whom he was godlike. He had perhaps the most famous outfield arm in baseball history, and his performance in October 1971 is on the short list of the great World Series performances of all time. Clemente was highly respected, though he could be vain and tempermental, and he played the game with fire. He died a hero’s death - in a New Year's Eve plane crash while running supplies to earthquake-ravaged Nicaragua, which he was handling personally to combat smugglers and black marketeers. He finished his career with exactly 3,000 hits. He had his waiting period for the Hall of Fame waived, and baseball named one of its most prestigious awards after him (the one given annually to the player who does the most to help his community). Left fielder Rocky Colavito (1955-68) was really a right fielder, but he moves across the pasture to make room for Clemente. His arm was just as strong, but maybe not quite as deadly accurate. Colavito blasted 374 home runs and drove in 100 runs a half-dozen times. Center fielder Roy Cullenbine (1938-47) is the most anonymous player in this starting lineup, but he’ll bat leadoff and score an insane number of runs. He was a .276 hitter who drew enough walks to push his on-base percentage over .400.

Catcher: Roy Campanella (1948-57) was a prodigious slugger who won three MVP awards, had a cannon arm behind the plate and was a beloved team leader on the “Boys of Summer” Brooklyn Dodgers. He was paralyzed in a car accident and never played with the team after its move to L.A., but he remained a familiar presence until his death in 1993.

Rotation: Roger Clemens (1984-2007) is one of the great pitchers of all time – a 354-184 record, 4,672 strikeouts, seven Cy Young Awards and an MVP. He pissed a lot of people off and never seemed too worried about that fact. He came up with the Red Sox and starred for many years, but when the team decided that he had run out of gas he left on a mission - he went out and won the next to Cy Young Awards (with Toronto) just to spite the folks in Boston who had written him off. He went on to win two more Cy Youngs, one with the Yankees and one with the Astros. He was as tough a competitor as there ever was on the mound. Accusations of steroid use arose after he retired. He has adamantly denied it; very few people believe him, but he is going to court to protest his innocence. Rip Collins (1920-31) was a fine pitcher who won 108 games, then retired to a career in law enforcement (in addition to sheriff and police chief, he was one of the few major leaguers who was a true Texas Ranger). Ray Caldwell (1910-21) won 133 games, most of them for the Yankees in the teens, though he was also a 20-game winner on the Cleveland Indians championship team in 1920. Roger Craig (1955-66) was a good pitcher who had the unfortunate role of staff ace on the expansion Mets, for whom he went 15-46 in two years. As a manager and pitching coach, he helped popularize the split-fingered fastball. Ray Culp (1963-73) won 122 games, including six seasons between 14-17 victories.

Bullpen: Here is the Achilles’ heel on an otherwise fabulous team. The closer is Rick Camp (1976-85), a decent but hardly dominant reliever who won 56 games and saved 57 for the Braves. Reggie Cleveland (1969-81) was a durable righty who spent half his career as a starter and won 105 games. Rickey Clark (1966-72) was a swingman who had a good rookie year at age 21 but did not develop into anything special. Red Causey (1918-22) bounced around the National League and won 39 games. Rheal Cormier (1991-2007) was a pretty decent lefty who hung around until he was 40, as pretty decent lefty relievers tend to do. Russ Christopher (1942-48) was a good righty for the Phillies. Ralph Citarella (1983-87) did some OK work out of the Cardinals’ bullpen. Not a terrible bullpen, but not exactly a well-defined one either.

Bench: Second baseman Robinson Cano (2005- ) is a .300 hitter with good power and is just entering the prime of his career. Outfielder Rico “Beeg Mon” Carty (1963-79) was a terrific hitter whose knees betrayed him, and a colorful character whose spirit never let him down. He batted .299 with 200 home runs, and if we were using the DH, he would be playing a whole lot here. Royce Clayton (1991-2007) was never a star, but what the hell, he finished his career with 935 runs, 110 homers and 231 steals, so he can find work as a backup shortstop. Ripper Collins (1931-41) was a switch-hitting slugger and one of the hard-partying members of the Gas House Gang. He and Carty will be monstrous pinch-hitters and will keep the bench lively. Rick Cerone (1975-92) had the unfortunate task of taking over (the following season) as Yankees catcher after Thurman Munson’s plane went down, and he responded admirably with the best year of his career.

Manager: Red Corriden Sr. was a little pepperpot who finished out the dismal 1950 season as interim manager of the White Sox after Jack Onslow was fired. We’re guessing he’ll have better luck with the talent on this roster.

RD:The Roberto Durans

Infield: Third baseman Ray Dandridge is one of the guys who got caught in the generation of Negro Leaguers who saw the color line come down but weren't given their chance. He was probably the most egregious case, actually. A great line drive hitter and a spectacular fielder, he was a star for more than a decade in the Negro Leagues and in Mexico. He was in his mid-30s when the color line came down, and he was still at or near the top of his game. He was eventually signed by the Giants and he batted well over .300 for several years in their minor-league chain but never got brought up to the majors. Second baseman Ray Durham (1995-2008) could be an electrifying player to watch. He was fast and quick and had some power, just a marvelous athlete. The year that Michael Jordan came to spring training with the White Sox, Durham reportedly bested him in the vertical leap. Durham scored 100 runs six straight years, topping 120 twice. He would hit 30-40 doubles, 15-20 home runs, steal 25-30 bases and even draw some walks. First baseman Ryan Doumit (2005- ) is in mid-career with the Pirates. He is actually a catcher who can be moved to first base or corner outfield. He has hit well enough but still has not batted 500 times in a season, and the Pirates seem dead set against giving him a full-time job anywhere. Shortstop Red Downs (1907-12) was a utility-type player, primarily a middle infielder, who had a very brief career in the majors but had a couple of 200-hit seasons in the Pacific Coast League in his thirties. (As a side note, dozens of major-leaguers have gone by the nickname “Red.” They made all-star games, even the Hall of Fame. But the nickname abruptly died out sometime after World War II, and we can’t find a single player whose career began after 1950 or so who was nicknamed “Red.” We blame Joe McCarthy. The senator, not the Hall of Fame manager.)

Outfield: Left fielder Rob Deer (1984-96) was a very extreme player. A typical Rob Deer season involved a batting average around .225 or .230 and leading the league in strikeouts, but also drawing some walks and hitting 25-30 home runs. He had a lot of very strange distinctions, such as the most RBI with a batting average below .200 (64 RBI, .179 BA) and the first ever with 100 more strikeouts than RBI (186 K, 80 RBI). You wouldn’t want a whole team of Rob Deers, but when you added up his pluses and minuses, he was a good player. Right fielder Rap Dixon was a Negro League star who combined power and speed, as well as a powerful throwing arm. With the Keystone Giants in the 1920s, he played alongside Oscar Charleston and Fats Jenkins in one of the great outfields of all time. Center fielder Ray Demmitt (1909-19) was a fast guy who hit a lot of triples and bounced around four teams.

Catcher: Rick Dempsey (1969-1992) didn’t hit much, but he was a fine defensive catcher, a smart player and a popular teammate, so he stuck around long enough to play in four decades. An inveterate comedian, he would sometimes entertain the crowd during rain delays by running onto the field and flopping around the water pooled on top of the tarp while pantomiming an inside-the-park home run. He was MVP of the 1983 World Series.

Rotation: Ron Darling (1983-95) grew up in Hawaii, attended Yale and was a tremendously handsome man named “Darling.” Everything a man needs to be a star in New York. Darling was a fine pitcher for several years, a key player on the Mets’ 1986 championship team. He finished with 136 victories, but a lot of people in baseball thought of him as a guy who never got the most out of his ability. Ryan Dempster (1998- ) is a Canadian with a wicked changeup and a funky pitching motion that involves shaking his glove around during his “stretch.” A good starting pitcher, he took a detour through the bullpen and spent three seasons as a closer in mid-career before returning to the rotation. Red Donahue (1893-1906) won 164 games and had three 20-win seasons. He finished at 164-175 but would have been 31 games over .500 for his career if he hadn’t gone 17-59 in two years for a couple of dreadful St. Louis Browns teams. Richard Dotson (1979-90) went 22-7 for the 1983 White Sox, part of a pitching staff that looked like it was really going to be something. Reality set in the following year. Dotson won 111 games in his career. Ryan Drese (2001-06) was a big, strapping righty whose best season was in 2004, when he went 14-10 with a 4.20 ERA for Texas. An elbow injury sidetracked his career at age 30, but by that point it seems to have largely run its course already.

Bullpen: Rob Dibble (1988-95) was the nastiest of The Nasty Boys, a 6-foot-4, 230-pound fireballer who averaged 12 strikeouts per nine innings. He was known for his histrionics and temper flare-ups on the field, and one of the most famous images of Dibble is the footage of him ripping his vintage jersey off after surrendering a walk-off home run during a “Turn Back the Clock” game. Injuries effectively ended his career before he turned 30, but he was a hellacious pitcher for a few years there. Ron Davis (1978-88) might have been the first reliever to be specifically called a “set-up man,” helping to establish a new role in support of the modern closer. He spent three years setting up the Goose in New York, going 27-10 with ERAs below 3.00. He signed with Minnesota and spent a few years closing, but he is best remembered for his years with the Yankees. Ryne Duren (1954-65) was the right-handed version of the prototypical wild lefty. He threw an overpowering fastball, often couldn’t control it, and for good measure, he had terrible eyesight and wore thick glasses, a combination the scared the hell out of hitters. Yogi Berra used to stand up behind the plate and wave his hands around shouting, “Can you see me, Ryne? I’m over here!” Just to scare the batters a little more. He had a couple of terrific seasons, in 1958-59, for pennant-winning Yankees teams. Rick DeHart (1997-2003) was a lefty who gave up too many hits, including too many long ones. The Rangers drafted R.A. Dickey (2001- ) in the first round in 1996, then realized that he was inexplicably missing a tendon in his right elbow. Everyone assumed he would break down, but he never did. He never pitched all that well, even after reinventing himself as a knuckleballer, until he unexpectedly got his act together in his mid-30s and had a fine year for the Mets in 2010. If he keeps this up, he will be moving into the rotation. Rob Dressler (1975-80) was a control specialist who gave up a lot of hits but very few walks or strikeouts. Predictably, he did not last long, though he did not pitch all that badly. Ramon de los Santos (1974) went 1-1 with a 2.19 ERA in 12 games for the 1974 Astros. He went back and pitched fairly well in the minors for a couple of years but never made it back to the bigs.

Bench: Third baseman Russ Davis (1994-2001) hit a bunch of home runs in the Yankees’ minor-league organization and a lot of people got all crazy about what a great slugger he was going to be. It didn’t work out quite that way. He was traded to Seattle in a deal for Tino Martinez, and Tino went on to win four World Series titles with New York. In Seattle, Davis hit 20 home runs a year for a few seasons (including the first home run ever at Safeco) and then faded away. A dreadful defender with no speed and poor command of the strike zone. But he came billed as a power hitter, and he did OK with that. Rich Dauer (1976-85) was the Orioles second baseman in the years after Davey Johnson and Bobby Grich. He couldn’t hit like those guys, but he was a slick fielder, one of Earl Weaver’s role players, and he was a starter on two pennant winners. Backup catcher Red Dooin (1902-16) hit even less than Rick Dempsey, but he hung around for almost 1,300 games. Outfielder Rajai Davis (2006- ) is a fast guy in mid-career. Rolla Daringer (1914-15) was a shortstop who couldn’t hit.

Manager: Rod Dedeaux coached Southern Cal to 11 College World Series titles and was sort of the beloved paterfamilias of amateur baseball in the U.S. for several decades. He was the on-set consultant who helped the actors hone their baseball skills for “Field of Dreams,” and when director Phil Alden Robinson asked him about his major-league career, he realized the Dedeaux was almost a “Moonlight Graham” himself – he made it to the majors in 1935 at age 21, played two games, then got injured and never played again. Like Doc Graham, he found his calling and built a tremendously successful career just the same.

RF: The Ric Flairs

Infield: First baseman Ron Fairly (1958-78) was a solid player who got some hits, drew some walks, hit a dozen or so home runs per year and played his position well. A very effective hitter whose stats don't fully reflect his abilities because he played his prime years in Dodger Stadium during a pitchers' era. Shortstop Rafael Furcal (2000- ) is primarily known for two things – his speed (the kid could fly when he first came up) and his throwing arm (an absolute Howitzer). Aside from those two skills, he’s a .288 hitter with a bit of power and a decent batting eye. Third baseman Ryan Freel (2001-09) had some speed, and he would take a walk, but in general he doesn’t do enough to put runs on the board. He’s better suited to a utility role or a fourth outfielder job, but on this team he starts at third base. Second baseman Ray French (1920-24) batted .193 in a short career.

Outfield: Left fielder Roy Foster (1970-72) is a “what if” case. He hit 23 home runs for Cleveland in 1970 and was runner-up to Thurman Munson for Rookie of the Year (and actually won The Sporting News’ honor as the AL’s top rookie). The injuries began the following season, and he dropped to 18 home runs. More injuries ensued, and he missed half of the ’72 season. He never played in the majors again. Right fielder Robert Fick (1998-2007) batted .258 and could hit the occasional long ball. His towering grand slam on Sept. 27, 1999, was the last hit in the history of Tiger Stadium. Rikkert Faneyte (1993-96) batted .174, but he was the best player in baseball history named Rikkert. (There was, however, a better player named Rikalbert.)

Catcher: Rick Ferrell (1929-47) was a great defensive catcher and he had about as good a batting eye as a player can have – 277 strikeouts and 931 walks in 7072 plate appearances. Somehow this got him into the Hall of Fame. That’s a bit excessive, but it takes nothing away from the fact that he was a valuable player.

Rotation: Negro League legend Rube Foster was a spectacular pitcher before he became a manager, team owner and league builder/promoter. Foster may have been the best Negro League pitcher before Satchel Paige. According to legend, he taught Christy Mathewson how to throw the famous fadeaway pitch, though that account has been called into question. Hall of Famer Red Faber (1914-33) won 254 games for the White Sox and led the league in ERA twice. He was injured at the end of the 1919 season; Ray Schalk said that if Faber had been available to pitch in the World Series, the fix either would not have happened or would not have succeeded. Ray Fisher (1910-20) won 100 games for the Yankees and the Reds, and he was on the Cincinnati team that beat the Faber-less White Sox in 1919. Russ Ford (1909-15) is credited with inventing the “emery ball,” a variation of the spitball that involved scuffing the ball with a small chunk of an emery board. He won 26 games in 1910 and 22 in 1911 for the Yankees. In all he won 73 games for the Yankees, then jumped to the Federal League and won 26 games in two years for Buffalo. Rube Foster (1913-17) pitched for the Red Sox and was actually a pretty good pitcher for a few years – but in baseball terms, he will always be the other Rube Foster.

Bullpen: Rollie Fingers (1968-85) was a very fine closer for the Oakland A’s championship teams, and manager Dick Williams’ use of him in late-inning situations helped define the evolving role of the closer in the 1970s. Fingers was inexplicably given an MVP award for pitching 78 innings for the Brewers in 1981, and he was inducted into the Hall of Fame in his first year of eligibility. In 1972, A’s owner Charlie Finley offered his players bonus money for growing cool facial hair, and Fingers responded with great gusto, fashioning an elaborate, bushy handlebar that harkened back to the stars of the 19th century. Roy Face (1953-69), who preceded Fingers in the evolution of the closer, went 18-1 for the Pirates in 1959. In his career, he won 104 games and saved 193. Ryan Franklin (1999- ) was one of first players busted for steroids after MLB finally began its testing program, but no one really cared because he wasn’t a big, bulky guy who hit home runs. He had a great year closing games for the Cardinals in 2009 but went downhill after that. Ray Fontenot (1983-86) was a decent lefty swingman for a couple of years. Randy Flores (2002- ) is one of those modern lefty relievers who comes in, gets one out, and then hits the showers. His brother Ron Flores (2005-07) was also a lefty, but he actually averaged an inning per appearance. Ray Francis (1922-25) went 12-28 for three teams.

Bench: Ray Fosse (1967-79) was a good defensive catcher with decent power, but he will forever be known as the guy who Pete Rose pancaked in the 1971 All-Star Game. Roger Freed (1970-79) was a big lummox of an outfielder, but he accepted his lot as a role player and was a good pinch-hitter. He earned his spot in Cardinals lore on May 1, 1979, when his 11th-inning grand slam off Joe Sambito erased a 6-3 Houston lead and gave the St. Louis a walkoff victory. Red Fisher (1910) was an outfielder who hit .125 in a brief career. Ray Flaskamper (1927) is the backup infielder. His nickname was “Flash,” but that was apparently just a play on his name rather than any sort of commentary on his style of play. Ray Fitzgerald (1931) was an outfielder who batted .300 in 3,000 minor-league at-bats but went 0-for-1 in the majors. On this team, he might get the chance to play a bit.

Manager: Who else? Rube Foster. (And we don’t mean the one who pitched for the Sox.) Foster was a player-manager by his late 20s and was a highly successful one, including one reported winning streak of 48 games. He became the most vital manager and exective in black baseball, eventually becoming president of the Negro National League. Foster fell ill in his late 40s and died at age 51. The Negro National League collapsed without him.

RG: The Ray Gateses

Infield: First baseman Ray Grimes (1920-26) could hit — .329 lifetime, with walks and gap power. He holds the major league record for consecutive games with an RBI (17). He had a relatively brief career in the majors – not sure why – but he returned to the minors and continued to hit between .300-.350 until he was 36 years old. (Side note: His twin brother Roy didn’t make this team because he wasn’t very good, and his son Oscar Ray Grimes Jr. didn’t make this team because he went by his first name instead of his middle name.) Third baseman Rene Gonzales (1984-97) was given lots of opportunities to hit, but he never did. He played for seven teams and batted .239. Ricky Gutierrez (1993-2004) was a bad defensive shortstop who didn’t really hit all that well either, but he played more than 1,000 games. Second baseman Rod Gilbreath (1972-78) was one of several generic middle infielders who rotated through Atlanta’s infield in the mid- to late-1970s. He was rushed to the big leagues at age 19 but never did hit. Spent many years in the organization as a minor-league manager and a front office executive.

Outfield: Left fielder Ralph Garr (1968-80) was so fast that they called him Road Runner. He sprayed the ball to all fields, and he chopped it down to create high infield hops and he ran like crazy, and it got him a .306 lifetime average and a batting title (.353 in 1971). He didn’t take many walks and he was an absolutely terrible defensive outfielder, but he was fun to watch. Ron Gant (1987-2003) came up as an infielder but was not up to the task defensively, so he moved to the outfield and had a fine career – 321 home runs, 243 steals and he topped 1,000 runs and 1,000 RBI despite missing a full season in his prime because of a motorcycle accident. More of corner guy, but on this team he’ll be stretched to play center. Right fielder Rusty Greer (1994-2002) was a .300 hitter who drew a lot of walks, banged a lot of doubles and hit a few home runs. He drove in 100 runs three times and scored 100 runs three times. A very good hitting outfield, but the defense is going to be problematic, as all three are best-suited for left field. (Well, Garr is best suited for DH, but if he has to wear a mitt, you’d put him in left and cross your fingers.)

Catcher: Rich (Turn Me On) Gedman (1980-92) was the Red Sox catcher in the post-Fisk era. A lefty with some pop, he hit 58 home runs from 1984-86 and made two all-star teams. He will always be remembered with melancholy by Red Sox fans for his role in the infamous defensive collapse during Game 6 of the 1985 World Series. (Bucker remains the iconic figure there, but Gedman contributed too.)

Rotation: Ron Guidry (1975-88) was a graceful lefty who played his whole career for the Yankees and had some great seasons on his way to a 170-91 record. He was known as either Gator or Louisiana Lightnin’, and in 1978 he had the best season by an American League pitcher between Lefty Grove and Pedro Martinez, going 25-3 with a 1.74 ERA. He was a terrific pitcher, and a classy guy on a turbulent team. Lefty Ross Grimsley (1971-82) was so superstitious that he reportedly would not shower or otherwise groom himself if he was on a winning streak. He won 124 games in his career, and between 1971-79, he was in double-digits in victories eight times, including 20 wins in ’78. So you know there were some days when he got pretty whiffy. Ruben Gomez (1953-67) was a solid Puerto Rican right-hander who won as many as 17 games for the Giants, but he will always be known for an incident in 1956 in which he hit Braves slugger Joe Adcock with a pitch and then fled the mound in terror when the 220-pound Adcock charged him. Ralph Glaze (1906-08) won 15 games for Boston during the period when the team was transitioning from the Americans to the Red Sox. Rich Gale (1978-84) was a 6-foot-7 righty who won 14 games as a rookie but who never really found the strike zone.

Bullpen: Closer Rich Gossage (1972-94) was a smoke-throwin’ monster. In the late 1970s and early 1980s, he was pretty much unhittable. He had 310 career saves, many of them of the two- and three-inning variety. You didn’t want to mess with the Goose. Rich Garces (1990-2002) was a corpulent Venezuelan affectionately known as El Guapo, though he could have just as easily been called El Gordo. But, physical stature aside, he could get people out and was a good set-up man for a decade. Rob Gardner (1965-73) was a lefty swingman who pitched for six teams in eight years. He was constantly involved in minor trades and was swapped for both Matty and Felipe Alou but never Jesus. Rube Geyer (1910-13) pitched for the Cardinals and had the distinction of giving up the first career home runs to two Hall of Fame managers (Casey Stengel and Bill McKechnie). Rosman Garcia (2003-04) was a Venezuelan string bean who basically never got anybody out. He washed out of the majors but is still pitching in the Mexican League. Ryan Glynn (1999-2005) is a local kid from Portsmouth, Va., and the only player from Virginia Military Academy to ever reach the majors. Reggie Grabowski (1932-33) pitched ineffectively for the Phillies.

Bench: Ross Gload (2000- ) is an outfielder and first baseman with no power, speed or batting eye, but he’s not bad at slapping singles. Ruben Gotay (2004- ) is a weak-hitting middle infielder. Ryan Garko (2005- ) is a first baseman with some pop who could eventually take over the starting job here. Rod Gaspar (1969-74) was a reserve outfielder on the Miracle Mets. He didn’t hit much, but he’ll be a much-needed defensive sub on this roster. Russ Gibson (1967-72) was a light-hitting catcher for the Red Sox and Giants.

Manager: Ron Gardenhire has had a great run with the Twins, winning six division titles and putting up 90-plus wins on a regular basis. He was actually as good as the mimddle infelders on this roster, but we'll let him focus on the dugout.

SIDEBAR: Roy Gleason

Roy Gleason has the sort of statistical line that makes you look twice.

He was was 6-foot-6 and 220 pounds. At age 20, he appeared in eight games for the L.A. Dodgers team that would go on to sweep the Yankees in the World Series. He never played the field and only batted once, which means he pinch-ran a lot, an interesting job for a guy built like a power forward. In his only at-bat, he doubled.

And he never played again after 1963.

The ever-useful retrosheet.org fills in some of the details. He was a late-season call-up who pinch-ran five times for Moose Skowron and twice for Frank Howard, two very fine hitters who were not very fine runners. Howard was even bigger than Gleason, and Skowron was, well, a moose. On the next-to-last day of the season, Walt Alston sent him up to pinch-hit for pitcher Phil Ortega. Gleason doubled off of Phillies lefty Dennis Bennett and eventually scored.

Here's what baseballreference.com and retrosheet.org don't tell you about Roy Gleason:

He was a hometown boy from suburban L.A. (Temecula, to be precise) who signed for a big bonus. He was not eligible for the World Series in 1963, and even if he was, he would not have made the postseason roster on this powerhouse team. But he was given a World Series ring just the same.

He went back to the minors, and while he seems to have been a decent hitter, there is nothing in his minor-league stats that suggest he was destined for stardom, or even for an extended major-league career in the outfield. He had some power, but he struck out a lot and didn't hit for a high average. If he was especially fast, his statistical line doesn't reflect it.

Near the end of spring training in 1967, he was informed by Selective Service that he had been reclassified from 3A (sole financial provider to his single mother) to 1A, and that he had been drafted. He was sent to Vietnam as an Army sergeant, and on July 24, 1968, he was seriously injured when he took a bunch of shrapnel in his arms and legs.

He was shipped home with nothing but the uniform on his back. Among the items left behind in his foot locker in the jungle was his 1963 World Series ring. He is the last major-league player to have received the Purple Heart.

After recuperating, he tried to resume his career, but in 1969 he batted just .187 in 101 games at Single-A Bakersfield and Double-A Alburquerque. His baseball career was over.

Fast-forward about three decades. Roy Gleason is selling cars. One day, a customer recognizes him as the former L.A. prep star who played briefly for the Dodgers. They chat. The guy is a writer. He ends up writing a book, "Lost in the Sun: Roy Gleason's Oddysey from the Outfield to the Battlefield."

In September 2003, Gleason was invited to throw out the first pitch at a Dodgers game. After he threw his pitch, he started to leave, but Vin Scully came on the P.A. and asked him to stay on the field for a moment. The entire Dodgers team came out of the dugout to shake Gleason's hand, and manager Jim Tracy presented him with a replica of his 1963 World Series ring.

Roy Gleason didn't make the roster of the "RG: Ray Gateses."

But we wanted to tell his story just the same.

RH: The Roman Hruskas

Infield: On one side of the infield, you’ve got one of the most prodigious lefty sluggers and perhaps the best right-handed hitter of all-time. On the other side of the infield you’ve got two very functional hitters with mid-range power. Second baseman Rogers Hornsby (1915-37) wasn’t much with the glove, and he was apparently a consummate jackass, but oh my, could he hit. A .358 career batting average, with walks, with doubles, with home runs. At the dawn of the live ball era, he was just behind Ruth on the list of the best hitters in the game, and in the early 1920s he put up some of the greatest offensive numbers ever. Hornsby was arrogant, tempermental and mean, and as he bounced from team to team over the second half of his career, the teams he left often got better and the teams he joined often took steps backward. An unquestionably great hitter, but he comes with some baggage. At first base there’s Ryan Howard (2004- ), who between 2006-09 had 198 home runs, 572 RBI and 765 strikeouts. He is listed at 6-4 and 240 pounds, but he looks much bigger. Immobile on defense and slow on the bases, but he can still mash the ball. Third baseman Richie Hebner (1968-85) hit 15-20 home runs per year and finished with more than 200 in his career. He was a consistent hitter who did a lot of things right, and in the offseasons he worked as a gravedigger. How cool is that? Ron Hansen (1958-72) was a fine defensive shortstop who could hit 20 home runs in a good year, but his career was derailed by back problems. Playing for Washington on July 30, 1968, Hanson turned the first unassisted triple play in 41 years. Two days later, on Aug. 1 he hit a grand slam. On Aug. 2, the Senators traded him. OK, granted, he had struck out in the six previous at-bats before the grand slam, and he was hitting .185, but still …

Outfield: Center fielder Rickey Henderson (1979-2003) could be obnoxious and narcissistic at times, but he was never as toxic in the clubhouse as Hornsby was. Like Hornsby, he spent the second half of his career moving from one team to the next, but there was always the sense that he was helping each team that he moved to, and he was able to remain useful well into his 40s through intelligence and remarkable conditioning. Henderson, the greatest leadoff batter in history, will score a hell of a lot of runs batting in front of Rajah and Ryan Howard. (Hebner probably bats in the 2-hole and scored 120 runs.) Henderson scored more runs than anyone in history, and his career stolen base record (1,406) is going to be on the books for a while - if you took the top three active base stealers and added their career totals together, they are still well short of Rickey's record. He spent the first half of his career with the A's and the Yankees, and he was about as electrifying a player as you've ever seen. He never won a Gold Glove but he could have. Left fielder Richard Hidalgo (1999-2005) batted .314 for the Astros in 2000, with 42 doubles, 44 home runs, 118 runs and 122 RBI. Do that a few times and they send you to Cooperstown. Hidalgo had other good seasons but never came close to those numbers again. He finished his career with some fine numbers - 171 home runs and a .490 slugging percentage - but is mostly remembered for that one season hammering the ball. Right fielder Ralph Hodgin (1939-48) was a left-handed hitter without any power, but he’d get some singles.

Catcher: Ramon Hernandez (1999- ) has more than 150 career home runs and plays solid defense. He’s still adding to that home run total, still going strong in his mid-30s.

Rotation: Roy Halladay (1998- ) is one of the top pitchers of his generation and appears to be on his way to a Hall of Fame-caliber career. He's a workhorse who has won two Cy Young Awards and is moving toward 200 career victories. When he gets on a roll, he's almost unbeatable, and in 2010 he threw the second postseason no-hitter in history - against the Reds in the NLDS. Ray Herbert (1950-66) won 104 games, including a 20-win season for the White Sox in 1963. Rich Harden (2003- ) is a really, really good pitcher when he’s healthy, but that's not often. He strikes out a batter per inning, and his career record of 56-34 should be much better. Rick Honeycutt (1977-97) was a solid lefty who spent the first half of his career as a starter on bad teams and the second half of his career as a reliever on good teams. Rick Helling (1994-2006) won 20 games for Texas in 1998 and won 93 games in his career.

Bullpen: Roberto Hernandez (1991-2007) was a big ol’ workhorse who pitched in more than 1,000 games and saved more than 300 of them. There was never any one point when he seemed like the best closer in the game, but he had a pretty long run as a pretty good closer. Ramon Hernandez (1967-77), no relation to the catcher, was a really good lefty who spent most of his career with the Pirates. Ricky Horton (1984-90) was a useful lefty who spent most of his career with the Cardinals. Rich Hinton (1971-79) is another lefty, not as good as Hernandez or Horton. Ron Herbel (1963-71) was a decent righty for the Giants. Roy Henshaw (1933-44) was a lefty swingman and the only player in major league history with the middle name Knikelbine. Roric Harrison (1972-78) was a righty swingman and the only player in major league history with the first name Roric.

Bench: Super utility man Rex “The Wonder Dog” Hudler (1984-98) was a scrappy guy who would play anywhere you asked him and give it his all. He had some good years but was best suited to being a role player more than a starter. Rollicking Rollie Hemsley (1928-47) had a drinking problem (Bill James suggests that he "seemed to take Prohibition as a personal challenge") but he was a fine defensive catcher for a long time. Ron Hunt (1963-74) was a second baseman who never learned to hit the inside fastball, so he learned to let the inside fastball hit him. (Rimshot!) Hunt specialized in getting on base by crowding the plate and getting hit by pitches. Take away his hit-by-pitches, and it would cost him about 40 points in career on-base percentage. Roy Howell (1974-84) was a third baseman with some power. Roy Hughes (1935-46) will be Hornsby’s defensive sub.

Manager: Ralph Houk won more than 900 games, and his Yankees won the World Series in 1961 and ’62. He moved into the front office for a while and then back into the Yankees dugout, spending several years overseeing the franchise's doldrums. He later managed the Tigers and the Red Sox with some success. He was very much a "players' manager," and Tommy Lasorda said Houk was a major influence on his style. Houk was a decorated World War II hero who rose to the rank of major, and in the Yankees clubhouse that was always his nickname - The Major.

RJ: The Rick James Superfreaks

Infield: Third baseman Ray "Jabbo" Jablonski (1953-60) had some pop, and he had 216 RBI in his first two seasons with the Cardinals. But he wasn’t that good of a hitter, and he was a very poor fielder, so he didn’t last long – though he went back down to the minors and played until he was almost 40, finishing with 215 minor-league home runs. Ricky Jordan (1988-96) was a first baseman without much power, and he didn’t have enough other attributes to hold down a starting job in the majors. Second baseman Randy Johnson (1982-84) has nothing in common with The Big Unit other than his name. Shortstop Russ Johnson (1997-2005) hit .264 with enough walks to be almost useful. Johnson and Johnson were both primarily third basemen, but they’re being stretched here to cover the middle of the infield.

Outfield: Right fielder Reggie Jackson (1967-87) mashed 563 home runs (many of them mammoth shots), added another 18 in postseason play (including, quite memorably four jacks on four consecutive swings against the Dodgers in ’78) and an unforgettable shot in the 1971 All-Star Game that might still be in orbit if it hadn’t hit a light tower atop Tiger Stadium. He was a great player in Oakland, but as he predicted, he had to go to New York to have a candy bar named after him. Simultaneously one of the most charismatic and divisive players in baseball history, an extremely smart guy but someone often lacking in tact and sensitivity. An undeniably great player, but a handful. (During his time in New York, it sometimes seemed as though Reggie, Billy Martin and George Steinbrenner were competing to see who could behave like the bigger horse's ass.) Center fielder Ruppert Jones (1976-87) had 147 home runs, 143 stolen bases and played in two all-star games. Left fielder Roy Johnson (1929-38) was a fine player, but overshadowed by his brother Bob. Roy’s middle name was Cleveland (and he was part Indian), but he never played for the Cleveland Indians – he played for the Tigers, Red Sox, Yankees and Braves. He hit a lot of doubles, a few home runs, and he had three seasons over 100 runs and one over 100 RBI.

Catcher: Rob Johnson (2007- ) might not ever be a starter in the bigs. Thus far, he has been unable to bat .200. But he’s the best RJ catcher we’ve got.

Rotation: Randy Johnson (1988- ), the 6-foot-10 lefty known as The Big Unit, is one of the best pitchers of all time. His blazing fastball and wicked slider led to almost 5,000 strikeouts, but with fewer walks than most flamethrowers. He won 303 games (against only 166 losses), and he picked up five Cy Young Awards, including four in a row with the Diamondbacks. He came up as a hard-throwing kid with the Expos but he didn't harness everything until he was traded to the Mariners. (In between the Mariners and the Dbacks, he spent a little more than a month with the Astros pitching about as well as a guy can pitch - 10-1, 1.28 ERA, 116 strikeouts and just 83 baserunners in 84 innings.) Talk about messing up a hitter’s timing – after The Big Unit’s smoke, opposing hitters will dig in against Randy Jones (1973-82) and his assortment of off-speed stuff. Jones, another lefty, threw a fastball that would bounce harmlessly off a window pane, but he won 20 games in 1975 and 22 in ’76 before injuring his arm and drifting into mediocrity. Ryan Jensen (2001-05) got hit hard for a few years in San Francisco and Kansas City. Rankin Johnson Sr. (1914-18) was a decent pitcher in a short career that covered four teams in three leagues spread over three seasons. Rick Jones (1976-78) pitched fairly well in his early-20s but drifted out of baseball by his mid-20s.

Bullpen: Closer Roy Lee Jackson (1977-86) is one of four Tuskegee grads to play in the majors. He was a pretty good pitcher for several years. Ricardo Jordan (1995-98) pitched well in 1996. The rest of his career, he didn’t pitch well. Ray Jarvis (1969-70) showed promise with the Red Sox but didn’t last long. Roy Joiner (1934-40) was a lefty who gave up a ton of hits. Rankin Johnson Jr. (1941) only pitched 10 innings in his career. He gave up 14 hits, three walks, struck out no one – but had a 3.60 ERA. Then he went into the service during World War II and he never pitched in the bigs again. Rip Jordan (1912-19) pitched poorly for the White Sox in 1912, so he went back to the minors for a few years. He pitched well, and after he won 15 games with a 1.43 ERA in the International League in 1919, the Washington Senators purchased his contract – and he got clobbered in the majors again.

Bench: Randy Jackson (1950-59) will push Jablonski for playing time at third base. (Note: This is not the guy from “American Idol,” dawg, and it’s not the guy from the Jackson Five.) He had 103 career home runs, so he’ll get his playing time on this outfit. Outfielder Reed Johnson (2003- ) is a pretty fair hitter who gets hit by pitches on a regular basis. Reggie Jefferson (1991-99) is a big, strong lefty and a career .300 hitter who was not especially mobile and was best suited for DH. Roy Jarvis (1944-47) was a backup catcher who got a quick shot during World War II but washed out after a few dozen at-bats and had a decent career in the minors. Rick Joseph (1964-70) was a corner infielder and corner outfielder with a little bit of pop. Infielder Ross Jones (1984-87) was a first-round draft pick out of University of Miami who didn’t pan out.

Manager: Roy Johnson managed one game for the Cubs in 1944. He lost it. We’ll give him a shot as player-manager to at least even his record.