JJ: The Jorge Julios

Infield: Third baseman Judy Johnson was a Negro League star, a line-drive hitter who had average speed but was a smart, instinctive baserunner. He was a key player on some of the best teams in Negro League history, including the Hilldale teams that won three straight Eastern Colored League titles in the mid-1920s, as well as the Homestead Grays and the Pittsburgh Crawfords in the 1930s. Joe Judge (1915-34) held down first base for the Washington Senators for the better part of two decades. He was a .300 hitter who was good for 30 doubles and 12-15 triples a year, and he drew a good number of walks. Second baseman Julian Javier (1960-72) was a slap-hitting, sac-bunting, hit-and-running infielder for the great Cardinals teams of the 1960s. (Improbably, he batted .333 in 19 World Series games.) He was a very prominent figure in the development of youth and winter leagues in his native Dominican Republic, and there are baseball stadiums named in his honor there. Shortstop Jimmy Johnston (1911-26) was a utility guy who was a .300 hitter for the Brooklyn Robins. Mostly a singles hitter, but capable of seasons with a good number of doubles and triples.
Outfield: Left fielder Shoeless Joe Jackson (1908-20) is perhaps the most star-crossed figure in baseball history, an illiterate South Carolina boy whose career as one of the great hitters of all time was cut short by his own greed and by the fact that he allowed himself to be influenced by the wrong teammates. He was a sensational hitter, .356 lifetime with tons of doubles and triples, a graceful outfielder. Everything they said about him in “Field of Dreams” was true, except for that whole part about being innocent. Jackson was banned for life because of his role in the fixing of the 1919 World Series. The precise nature of that role is difficult to pin down, but it is clear that he did play a role – maybe he was an active participant in the fix (the Reds hit an awful lot of triples to left field in that small handful of games), or maybe he played his best but positioned himself to get a cut of the gamblers’ money, but the idea that he was an innocent man is romantic revisionism. He remains a tragic figure, a great player brought down by his own weakness. Right fielder Jackie Jensen (1950-61) was some kind of athlete. At Cal, he was an All-American halfback, rushing for 1,000 yards and starring in the Rose Bowl. He also pitched Cal to the championship of the first-ever College World Series, beating a Yale team that featured a first baseman named George Herbert Walker Bush. He played for a couple of championship Yankees teams, had a brief stopover with the Senators, and then settled into the outfield in Boston. From 1954-59 he averaged 111 RBI per year for the Red Sox. Center fielder Jacque Jones (1999-2008) could hit .300 in a good year, and he could be counted on for 30 doubles and 20 home runs.

Catcher: John Jaso (2008- ) has a decent batting eye. He's in mid-career with Tampa and playing fairly regularly. That's as good as it gets here.

Rotation: Just as Jackie Jensen was the first to play in a Rose Bowl and a World Series, Joey Jay (1953-66) was the first to play in a Little League World Series and a big league one. He won 21 games for the pennant-winning Reds in 1961, and then another 21 the following year. He finished with 99 career victories, and he tried mightily for #100, but he was put out to pasture with an 0-4 record in 1966. Jason Jennings (2001-09) won the Rookie of the Year award because he went 16-8 and didn’t get hammered while pitching in Coors Field. He continued to pitch alright, although there were certainly years when the thin air got to him. Injuries hit in his late-20s, and while he has not yet formally retired, he certainly looks to be finished at this point with a career record of 62-74. Josh Johnson (2005- ) is an outstanding pitcher for the Marlins who is right in his prime and who led the NL in ERA in 2010. If he can stay healthier than Jason Jennings, he should have a good career. After injury problems in 2007 and ’08, he bounced back with a very strong 2009. Jimmy Jones (1986-93) was one of those guys who always looked like he should have been better than he was. He finished with a 42-39 career record, but he wasn’t really that good. Jason Johnson (1997-2008) was a 6-foot-6 righty with an especially ugly career record of 56-100. He wasn’t a good pitcher, but he wasn’t terrible either. He was at least as good as Jimmy Jones, and Jimmy Jones had a winning record. Jason Johnson pitched for 11 seasons. He had one winning record (8-7), one .500 record (10-10) and a whole bunch of seasons with records like 1-10, 3-12 and 5-14.

Bullpen: Closer Jose Jimenez (1998-2004) came up as a starter with the Cardinals and was occasionally brilliant. In 1999, he threw a no-hitter against Arizona to beat Randy Johnson 1-0, and then came back 10 days later to throw a 2-hitter against Arizona to beat Randy Johnson 1-0. (These two games were part of an incredible five-game stretch of hard luck in which The Big Unit pitched 40 innings, gave up just 25 hits and six runs, one of them unearned, struck out 62, and went 0-4. You could look it up.) Jorge Julio (2001- ) put in some years as a closer, but for much of that time he was not terribly effective. He piled up some saves but was rarely better than the league average in ERA, and his propensity for giving up home runs was a problem in the late innings of close games. Jim Johnson (2006- ) is in mid-career but seems to be establishing himself as a pretty fair pitcher. Jason Jacome (1994-98) showed some promise, with a 2.67 ERA in eight starts at age 23, but it was all downhill from there. Jesse Jefferson (1973-81) hung around for a long time, pitching for five teams, sometimes as a starter and sometimes as a reliever, but rarely as anything more than an average pitcher. His career record of 39-81 (oof) is largely the product of a few seasons with the expansion Blue Jays. He was 22-56 with Toronton, and 17-25 elsewhere. Jerry Johnson (1968-77) and Jesse Jefferson were teammates on the ’77 Jays. They had fairly similar careers, but Johnson was almost exclusively a reliever. He had one really good year (12-9, 2.97 with 18 saves for the 1971 Giants) but that one rather sticks out in the context of his career. Jing Johnson (1916-28) pitched five seasons for Connie Mack’s Athletics, spread out over more than a decade because of military service in World War I and a protracted (as in, seven years, that’s pretty damn protracted) salary dispute. Not a bad pitcher, and it would be interesting to see what he would have done with an uninterrupted career. He had a degree in chemistry from Ursinus College, and during his salary holdout he made a good living as a research chemist at Bethlehem Steel. After his playing career, he was athletic director and coach at his alma mater.

Bench: Jay Johnstone (1966-85) was an outfielder, pinch-hitter and resident practical jokester for two decades in the majors. He was a good enough ballplayer (.267 career with 102 home runs), and willing to be a role player. His sense of humor (and his insatiable hunger for attention) cast him as a “colorful character,” leading to two books of witticisms and a series of videotapes centering on practical jokes, bloopers and other funny stuff. First baseman John Jaha (1992-2001) was a very good hitter. He mashed minor-league pitching for several years before the Brewers gave him a shot in the bigs, and when he was healthy enough to play, he hit well in the majors as well. His batting average was inconsistent, but he drew walks and hit home runs (141 in 2775 career at-bats) and was a very productive hitter. Outfielder Jim Jackson (1901-06) was your basic .235 hitter. Lord Jimmy Jordan (1933-36) was a light-hitting infielder. Backup catcher Jason Jaramillo (1909- ) is a switch-hitter who doesn't hit much.

Manager: Jing Johnson’s college coaching career would seem to make him a good candidate.

JK: The Jackie Kennedys

Infield: Jeff Kent (1992-2008) is a difficult case to deal with. He’s a second baseman who hit 377 home runs and, for good measure, 560 doubles. Career batting average .290 with a reasonable number of walks. A long enough career to drive in 1,518 runs and score 1,320. He wasn’t a particularly good defensive second baseman, but he wasn’t bad either. Yes, he put up these numbers in the steroid era, and yes, his power did increase at an age when most guys are starting to decline, but he was always one of the most outspoken players against steroid use and in favor of mandatory testing. In short, he had a heck of a career. And yet, the general consensus seems to be “he didn’t feel like a Hall of Famer.” Part of that is that he seems to be, how to say this, a colossal jerk. He had a lot of fights with teammates, and there was a famous incident in which he claimed to have injured his wrist in some innocuous manner but later was found to have hurt himself while popping a wheelie on his motorcycle. So what do we make of him? He was a very good player. Was he one of the top 10 second basemen of all time? Probably not, but if you wanted to argue that he was, you wouldn’t look foolish doing so. We’ll leave it at this: He’s the best second baseman (heck, the best infielder) of all time with the initials J.K. Third baseman Jeff King (1989-99) was a useful ballplayer. Not a star, but a .260 hitter who drew a few walks and was good for 30 doubles and 20 homers in a good year, with decent defense. In the end, he topped 150 home runs and 700 RBI, which is not bad at all, but probably less than what was expected when he was taken with the top pick in the 1986 draft. First baseman Joe Kuhel (1930-47) was a steadily productive player who fashioned a long career out of batting .280 with 70 walks or so each year and a few extra-base hits. Shortstop Jeff Keppinger (2004- ) fills out the Three Jeffs and a Joe infield. Keppinger is a decent enough utility infielder, and shortstop is his primary position. As a starting shortstop he’s, well, adequate.

Outfield: Left fielder John Kruk (1986-95) is, as they say, a colorful character. He was a big lumpy guy who chewed tobacco by the cheekful, smoked cigarettes openly, and he said and did funny things on the field (as anyone can attest who remembers his All-Star Game at-bat against The Big Unit). He was an awfully good hitter, a .300 batter with a very good eye and enough pop to produce some doubles and home runs. He continued his career after being successfully treated for testicular cancer, and he was still a productive hitter in his mid-30s when he realized that he was no longer enjoying the game. So, when he saw that he was in the White Sox starting lineup on July 30, 1995, he told his manager that if he got a hit (to preserve his career .300 average) he was going to retire on the spot. He singled in his first at-bat, was replaced by a pinch-hitter and immediately got dressed and left the clubhouse, literally retiring in mid-inning. Being a colorful goofball, he was immediately courted by ESPN, where he now serves as an analyst who makes clever quips but falls flat on his face when he attempts to saying anything substantive (and who sometimes appears to be sweating from the very exertion of thinking). Center fielder Joe Kelley (1891-1908) was a turn-of-the-century Hall of Famer. He was a career .317 hitter who stole 443 bases, and he was one of the top stars on the legendary Baltimore teams in the late 1890s. Right fielder Jason Kubel (2004- ) is in mid-career with the Minnesota Twins. He went .300-28-103 in 2009 but dropped off in 2010. If he can get back to the 2009 level and stay there for a few years, this is one heck of an outfield.

Catcher: This will be a spirited competition between Johnny Kling (1900-13) and Jason Kendall (1996-2010). They’re both righties, so they can’t platoon. Kling batted .272 during the deadball era and was a good catcher. Kendall batted .290 during the big-hitting 1990s, had good extra-base pop and more walks than strikeouts. They both ran well and could steal 20 bases in a good year. Either one works, but Kling probably gets the starting job on the basis of the bonus points he receives for being the starting catcher for the great Cubs teams of the 'oughts.

Rotation: Jim Kaat (1959-83) pitched forever. He pitched in almost 900 games, most of them starts, and finished with 283 wins, 237 losses and 2,461 strikeouts. He was a smart, durable pitcher who won 16 Gold Gloves (for whatever that’s worth), and when his fastball began to lose its zip he made up for it with a wide variety of slop and a propensity for quickpitching that kept batters on their heels. Jerry Koosman (1967-85) pitched forever, too. Not as “forever” as Kitty Kaat, but pretty damn long just the same. They both lasted well into their 40s. Koosman, a lefty who was Seaver’s second banana with the Mets, won 222 games and might have been slightly better over the course of his career than Kaat. It’s close. Jimmy Key (1984-98) was better than either of them, and while he pitched for a long time, he didn’t last into his 40s like Koos and Kaat. Another lefty, Key won 186 games with a better winning percentage than the other two, and he won World Series titles with the Blue Jays and the Yankees (3-1, 2.66 in four World Series games). Jack Kralick (59-67) was a pretty good lefty, and Jack Kramer (1939-51), the only right-hander in the rotation, won 95 games while pitching for some fairly bad teams.

Bullpen: Jim Kern (1974-86), who starts out as the closer here, was a tall, skinny, goofy-looking guy with one hell of a fastball. Lots of strikeouts, lots of walks, not many hits, and some pretty decent seasons back in the day when closers would work 110-plus innings and win in double-digits. Jim Konstanty (1944-56) will be the primary setup guy, and if Kern falters, he will move into the closer role. Konstanty famously won the NL MVP for the 1950 Phillies, winning 16 games and saving 22. It was the best season of his career, but he had other good ones. Johnny Klippstein (1950-67) saved roughly as many games as Kern and Konstanty, and he was a durable, consistent pitcher, so he’ll get his share of work. Joe Kerrigan (1976-80) was occasionally effective in a career shortened by arm injuries and has had a much longer career as a pitching coach. Jack Knott (1933-46) was a solid swingman who pitched for some bad teams but lasted a long time. Joe (“The Colonel”) Klink (1987-96) and Joe (“The Patriarch”) Kennedy (2001-07) were functional lefties.

Bench: The best player on the bench will most likely be whichever catcher is not starting on any given day, either Kling or Kendall. John Kennedy (1962-74) was a utility infielder who would not be much remembered today if he didn’t have the same name as a certain president. John Knight (1905-13) was a utility infielder who isn’t remembered today for any reason. Backup outfielder Jim King (1955-67) was a consistent double-digit home run guy. Outfielder-first baseman Judson Fabian “Jay” Kirke (1910-18) was a .300 hitter, which wasn’t a huge deal back then, but it wasn’t bad either.

Manager: Johnny Keane managed the Cardinals to the 1964 World Series title and then immediately quit because of a season-long feud with ownership that had boiled over before the Cardinals’ famous run to the pennant (past the flopping Phillies). Keane apparently wrote the letter of resignation in September but showed the good judgment to wait until after he had won the World Series to actually turn it in. The Yankees, who had lost to the Cardinals in the World Series, immediately fired Yogi Berra and hired Keane, which didn’t turn out so well for anyone involve. Keane was fired after a little more than a season, and the Yankees didn’t go back to the World Series for more than a decade. Keane died three years later at age 55, and some of his former players speculated that the immense strain of managing the Yankees as their long dynasty fell apart had hastened his physical demise.

JL: The Jerry Lewises

Infield: Shortstop John Henry Lloyd was one of the great players in the history of the Negro Leagues. He was called "The Black Wagner," and Honus Wagner said he was flattered by the comparison. Lloyd had an itinerant career, following the money from team to team, but he was a spectacular hitter and fielder everywhere he went, including an extensive career in Cuba. He played forever and was still winning batting titles in his 40s. Second baseman Jerry Lumpe (1956-67) was a slick fielder who will turn a lot of double plays with Lloyd. He came up as a role player on some very good Yankees teams, and then came of age as a starter in Kansas City and Detroit. First baseman James Loney (2006- ) hits for a decent average, draws a few walks and hits about 15 home runs per year. He's not exceptionally good at anything, but he's not bad at anything either. He's right in his prime, so we'll see where he goes at this point. Third baseman Jim Lefebvre (1965-72) was part of the Dodgers’ famous all-switch-hitting infield (along with Maury Wills, Jim Gilliam and Wes Parker). He was a solid, unspectacular ballplayer for some good Dodgers teams, and then he headed over to Japan and played well for a few years. His time in Japan came to an ugly end when he angrily hurled his mitt into the dugout and his manager, believing the mitt was aimed at his head, fined Lefebvre $10,000. The dispute was played out in the Japanese press, and while the fine was eventually rescinded, Lefebvre never played again, returning to the U.S. where he was a coach and manager for many years. Like some of his Dodgers teammates, he occasionally gained work acting in TV shows, once playing one of the Riddler’s thugs in a “Batman” episode and another time playing a comedic headhunter in “Gilligan’s Island.”

Outfield: Right fielder Jim Lemon (1950-63) led the American League in strikeouts for three straight years, but he also hit 164 career home runs despite not earning a full-time job in the majors until his late 20s. He ran well enough to lead the league in triples one time, but he was no threat to steal bases and he was a weak defensive outfielder. Center fielder Jim Landis (1957-67) was a brilliant glove man for the White Sox. He was a .250 hitter who drew a few walks and hit 15 home runs a year or so, but his primary value was as a top-flight center fielder. Left fielder Jeffrey “Hac Man” Leonard (1977-90) had a habit of pissing off pitchers. Sometimes, after hitting home runs, he would run the bases with one arm pumping and the other stationary. “One flap down,” he called it, and he said it was his way of saying that this particular home run was no big deal because the pitch (or the pitcher) wasn’t all that good. He was also known, at times, to hit a home run and round the bases at such a leisurely pace that opposing pitchers would feel the need to hit him in the ribs the next time he came up as a helpful hint to maybe run a little faster. He had such a cheerful demeanor that other players nicknamed him “Penitentiary Face.” He was a pretty fair player – a .270 hitter who knocked out 144 career home runs – and in the 1987 NLCS he batted .417 with four home runs, while also playing a central role in a series of fights, arguments and pissing matches between the Giants and Cardinals.

Catcher: Javy Lopez (1992-2006) was the catcher on those Braves teams that won the NL East every year. He was a .280 hitter with power (260 career home runs). For whatever it’s worth, Greg Maddux didn’t like pitching to Lopez, who worked too slowly to suit Maddux.

Rotation: Jim Lonborg (1965-79) went 22-9 for the pennant-winning Red Sox of 1967. He stuck around long enough to win 157 games, but he will always be remembered for his role in that “Impossible Dream” season. John Lackey (2002- ) is a big fellow who won 102 games for the Angels as a solid, durable starter. He moved to the Red Sox in mid-career and is still trying to adjust to Fenway Park. His current teammate, Jon Lester (2006- ) is well on his way to becoming a legend. He was a cancer survivor, a no-hitter thrower and a World Series hero, all before turning 27. His winning percentage is extraordinary, and he has been durable and consistent. If he stays healthy and stays with the Red Sox he should keep winning for the foreseeable future. Jon Lieber (1994-2008) won 20 for the Cubs in 2001 and won 131 in his career. Jose Lima (1994-2006) won 21 for the Astros in 1999 and won 89 in his career. He was only a so-so pitcher, but as a bonus he has a lovely singing voice. While pitching for the Norfolk Tides in 2006, he surprised the crowd one night by taking the microphone during Seventh Inning Stretch and brought the house down with “God Bless America.”

Bullpen: Jeff Lahti (1982-86) was a pretty fair, if anonymous, reliever who was sort of the chairman of the board of Whitey Herzog’s “Closer by Committee” in 1985 before rookie Todd Worrell showed up. He’ll be the closer here. Johnny Lindell (1941-54) was a combination pitcher-outfielder for the Yankees. He was more of an outfielder and a pitcher, and he was certainly a better hitter than he was a pitcher, but we’re deep in the outfield and shallow in the pen, so he’s going to get more work on the mound (though he’ll get his share of at-bats, too). Johnny Lush (1904-10) was also an outfielder-pitcher, but he was more of a pitcher. Javier Lopez (2003- ) does pretty well in the lefty “one-out specialist” role. Jack Lamabe (1962-68) was known as “Old Tomato Face,” which can’t possibly be a compliment. Johnny Lanning (1936-47) was known as “Tobacco Chewin’ Johnny” (yes, with the apostrophe), which if nothing else is better than “Old Tomato Face.” Lanning had some good years with the Braves and the Pirates. Jim Lindsey (1922-37) won 143 games in the minors. He didn’t really establish himself in the majors until 1930, when he was 34 years old, but he was a decent pitcher in the bigs.

Bench: This is one ass-kicking bench. In addition to Lindell and Lush being available as pinch-hitters, you’ve got Johnny Logan as a backup infielder and a group of fantastic bench players like Jim Leyritz, Jerry Lynch and John Lowenstein. Leyritz (1990-2000) was a catcher who could also play first, third and the outfield. He was a .260 hitter who, given even a part-time role, would reach double digits in home runs. (After his playing career ended, he killed a woman in a DUI accident and then compounding matters by giving a series of interviews in which he suggested that the real tragedy in the incident was his lost income.) Lynch (1954-66) was an outfielder best known as a pinch-hitter for the Reds. In 1961, he played a key role in the Reds run to the World Series, batting .315/.407/.624 with 50 RBI in just 181 at-bats. Lowenstein (1970-85) was a quirky dude who was a poor defensive outfielder who could also be stretched to be a poor defensive infielder, but he was a decent lefty hitter and a guy who gave good effort, and in his 30s he emerged as one of Earl Weaver’s platoon specialists and knocked the crap out of right-handed pitching for a few years. He was an odd character. He once plowed into the outfield wall and, despite being shaken up, decided to entertain the fans by pretending to be unconscious and the suddenly sitting bolt upright on the stretcher and pumping his fists. Logan (1951-63) was a scrappy shortstop for the fine Braves teams of the Aaron-Spahn-Mathews era. “Scrappy” in this instance means a little guy who played hard, as well as a guy who tended to get into a lot of fistfights on the field. He was a good ballplayer – a fine defensive shortstop, a decent hitter (.270 with 10-15 home runs per year) and a respected team leader. Jason LaRue (1999-2010) is the backup catcher who will work with any starting pitcher who shares Greg Maddux’s opinion of Javy Lopez. A backup catcher with almost 100 career home runs – a good way to complete one heck of a good bench. LaRue was catching for the Cardinals in 2010 when a brawl broke out with the Reds. Cincinnati pitcher Johnny Cueto gave LaRue a karate kick to the face, causing a concussion that ended LaRue's career.

Manager: Jim Leyland will be smoking his Marlboros in the JL dugout. He had some fine years in Pittsburgh, then won a World Series in Florida and an AL pennant in Detroit.

JM: The Joe Malones

Infield: Second baseman Joe Morgan (1963-84) was the best player in baseball in the mid-1970s, a guy who did absolutely everything well, as smart a player as you’ve ever seen, and a team leader and spark plug for The Big Red Machine. When he was younger, his greatness was masked by the Astrodome and the hitting conditions of the 1960s, and as he got older he was the sort of guy who was far more valuable than people realized. He is one of the greatest second basemen of all time – maybe the best – and his annoying qualities in the broadcast booth don’t diminish that in the least. For the Reds, he batted second behind Pete Rose. On this team, he will bat second behind third baseman John McGraw (1891-1906), a diminutive spitfire who batted .334 for his career and walked a ton, pushing his career on-base percentage to .466, third-highest of all time. He was every bit as a competitive as Rose – known to get into a fistfight or two, and always ready to trip, clutch or bump an opposing baserunner if he thought he could get away with it. First baseman John Mize (1939-56) will bat cleanup on this team, and with McGraw, Morgan and Joe Mauer batting in front of him, he might drive in 200 runs. Mize was a monstrously good hitter and an annual all-star, and his status among the all-time greats has grown even higher as more advanced statistical analysis has been developed. He was a .312 career hitter who drew walks and hit with power – led the league in home runs and slugging percentage four times each, RBI three times. He starred for a decade for the Cardinals and Giants, and the finished his career with five seasons as one of Casey Stengel’s platoon guys on the Yankees teams that won five straight World Series titles from 1949-53. Mize was 36 when he joined the Yankees, but in five World Series he batted .286/.362/.548. Shortstop Jim Mason (1971-79) looks around at the three Hall of Famers surrounding him in the infield and wonders what the hell he’s doing here. He was a terrible hitter and an adequate fielder, and he might actually be relegated to the bench and serving as a defensive replacement if Jim Morrison (a third baseman who can be stretched) takes over the starting shortstop job. But for now, Mason starts at shortstop and bats eighth or ninth, depending on who’s pitching.

Outfield: Left fielder Joe Medwick (1932-48) had a brief run as a great player and a long run as a good player, which added up to the Hall of Fame. He was known as “Muscles” and “Ducky Wucky” (shortened to “Ducky” by subsequent generations who couldn’t imagine a manly fellow answering to “Ducky Wucky”). In his peak years for the Cardinals, he was a .330 hitter who banged an ungodly number of doubles and triples, as well as 15-20 home runs per year. He was one of the hard-playing, hard-living guys who gave the Gashouse Gang its identity. He batted .379 in the 1934 World Series, and after a hard slide into a Tigers infielder during Game 7 he earned the distinction of being the only player in history ordered to come out of a postseason game for fear that the fans would riot and attack him. Center fielder Johnny Mostil (1918-29) was a decent hitter, a fleet baserunner and a fine defensive outfielder for the White Sox during the 1920s. In 1925, he led the American League in steals, walks and runs. Right fielder Jerry Mumphrey (1974-88) was never a great player, but he was a good player for a long time. He wasn’t great at anything, but he was good at just about everything.

Catcher: Barring anything unforeseen, Joe Mauer (2004- ) will go down as one of the greatest catchers who ever lived. Top 10? Top five? Hard to say, but the man is in the middle of his prime and already has three batting titles, two Gold Gloves and an MVP.

Rotation: Juan Marichal (1960-75) was a great pitcher with a high leg kick and a fiery temperament. Between 1963-69, he went 154-65 with an ERA of 2.34 but he never won a Cy Young Award because of a couple of guys named Koufax and Gibson. He finished his career at 243-142 with a 2.89 ERA. Jose Mendez was a Negro League star from Cuba. He gained fame in 1908 when the Cincinnati Reds traveled to Havana for a series of exhibitions. Mendez, 21 years old, pitched three times against the Reds and allowed eight hits and no runs in 25 innings, striking out two dozen. Iron Man Joe McGinnity (1899-1908) was a deadball workhorse who routinely led the National League in games pitched, innings pitched and victories. He played for some great teams, finished at 246-142 with a 2.66 career ERA. Jim Maloney (1960-71) was a flame-throwing right-hander for the Cincinnati Reds who was overpowering at his peak but who burned out due to arm problems. Between the ages of 23-26, he went 74-34 and had more strikeouts than hits (by a margin of more than 200). He threw two no-hitters and finished with a record of 134-84, but his legacy rests on a few years during the pitcher’s era when he was dominant. Some folks want to put Jack Morris (1977-94) in the Hall of Fame, but on this team he’s battling with Maloney for the right to be #4 in the rotation. (After all, the first three guys are in the Hall of Fame, and Marichal and McGinnity both finished 100 games over .500 for their careers.) The Hall of Fame case for Morris rests on his 254 career victories and his record in the postseason (seven playoff victories, three World Series titles with three different teams, and a legendary 10-inning shutout in Game 7 of the 1991 World Series.) But his career victory total, in truth, reflects that he was a good, durable pitcher who played for a lot of good teams – not anywhere close to the best pitchers of the previous generation (Seaver, Palmer, Carlton, etc.) or of the generation that followed (Clemens, Maddux, Pedro, The Big Unit, etc.).

Bullpen: Jeff Montgomery (1987-99) was the closer in Kansas City in the post-Quisenberry era. As such, he didn’t get a lot of attention, but he was a heck of a pitcher for a while there and he finished with 304 career saves. Jose Mesa (1987-2007) saved even more games (321), but he wasn’t as good a pitcher as Montgomery. He hung around a long time, pitched for eight teams, and he’ll be the primary setup guy here. Johnny Murphy (1932-47) was the relief ace for the DiMaggio-era Yankees, back when the role of relief ace was still evolving. He actually led the league in saves four times (compared to one apiece for Montgomery and Mesa), but no one knew it at the time because the statistic hadn’t been invented yet. In a way, he was the forerunner of Mariano Rivera, pitching in six World Series for the Yankees with a 1.10 ERA. He worked just eight games, 16 innings, in those six World Series so he’s not really that comparable to Rivera, but still, a 1.10 ERA over the course of six World Series (all of which the Yankees won) is pretty damn good. The four “long men” in the bullpen are actually accomplished starters who couldn’t crack this team’s hellacious rotation – John “The Count” Montefusco (1974-86), Joe Magrane (1987-96), Black Jack McDowell (1987-99) and the ageless Jamie Moyer (1986- ), who has more career wins than Jack Morris, basically the same winning percentage and the same ERA (relative to league average). Magrane was a lefty who could have been really good if he could have stayed healthy. McDowell at his peak was very similar to Jack Morris, a solid, durable guy who could win a lot of games if his team was any good. He was a Stanford graduate and a rock and roll guitarist in various bands with names like V.I.E.W. (which once toured with the Smithereens) and Stickfigure.

Bench: Justin Morneau (2003- ) is one hell of a pinch-hitter – one MVP award and a runner-up finish – but he ain’t about to move John Mize off of first base. He was having a sensational year in 2010 when he got kicked in the head while trying to break up a double play, and he is still trying to get his career back on track after the ensuing concussion. He and Mauer will room together on the road. Jim Morrison (1977-88) was a third baseman with some pop, 112 career home runs. He won’t supplant McGraw, but he did play a little shortstop and could nudge Jim Mason off that spot if the team decides to go with the stick over the glove. Outfielder JoJo Moore (1930-41) was a .300 hitter who started for three New York Giants pennant winners, and he’ll see some time in the outfield for this team. Joe McEwing (1988-2006) was a popular, hustling role player who wasn’t much of a hitter but who could literally play anywhere on the diamond other than catcher. His versatility gets him the final spot on the bench over John Milner, who was a good hitter but could only play left field and first base (and not very well). Backup catcher J.C. Martin (1959-72) will only start when Joe Mauer specifically asks for a day off.

Manager: Joe McCarthy might be the greatest manager of all time, a master strategist and motivator who won nine pennants and seven World Series titles and had a career winning percentage of .615 with the Cubs, Yankees and Red Sox. We’re guessing that McGraw (11 pennants, three World Series titles) will weigh in with his opinion on pretty much every move. Jack McKeon and John McNamara will be around to fetch coffee, sweep out the dugout and run errands as needed.

JN: The Jim Naborses

Infield: First baseman Johnny Neun (1925-31) was a pretty forgettable player – a switch-hitting singles hitter with a little bit of speed. But give him this, he knew how to be dramatic. In a relatively brief major-league career (432 games), he managed to turn an unassisted triple play (first person ever to end a game that way), and he once stole home in both games of a doubleheader. Second baseman Jayson Nix (2008- ) has been a .200 hitter (give or take) to this point in his career, and he’s in his late 20s, so let’s guess he isn’t going to blossom into a star. He has a brother named Laynce who also plays in the majors, so apparently their parents like adding that extraneous "Y" to traditional names. Jose Nieves (1998-2001) was an offensive zero, a .240 hitter who didn’t draw walks, didn’t hit for power and didn’t run especially well. Shortstop Junior Noboa (1984-94) was an even weaker hitter than Nieves. In truth, Nix, Nieves and Noboa are all utility infielders, and we’ll probably just send the three of them out to the infield and tell them to go wherever they like as long as all the holes are covered.

Outfield: Center fielder Jim Northrup (1964-75) never drove in 100 runs, but he once drove in 90. Heck, no one else on this roster ever drove in 90 runs in two seasons combined. (Actually, that’s not true, one of our platoon catchers did, and so did the backup first baseman.) Northrup wasn’t a major star, but he was a consistently productive hitter – .270 with some walks, 15-20 home runs, a few doubles and triples. More of a corner outfielder, but he can be stretched to play center. Right fielder Jon Nunnally (1995-2000) was a decent enough role player. He had a little bit of power and he ran OK and he drew some walks. He fizzled pretty quickly and was out of the majors well before he turned 30, but he was a functional lefty stick. Left fielder Jim Norris (1977-80) is your basic .260 hitter with a little bit of speed who played for some very forgettable Cleveland and Texas teams for a few years.

Catcher: Platoon combination of lefty Joe Nolan (1972-85) and righty Jeff Newman (1976-84). Nolan batted .260 and drew just enough walks to avoid being completely useless. Newman batted .220 and never walked, but he had a bit of power, and in 1979-80 he combined for 37 home runs and 127 RBI, which would be really good if he did it in one season but which is only marginally impressive spread over two. Makes him a key offensive contributor on this roster.

Rotation: Joe Niekro (1967-88) won 221 games in his career, narrowly edging Jim Perry for the distinction of being the pitcher with the most career victories without actually having the most victories in his own family. A knuckleballer like Phil, he had his best seasons with Houston in his 30s, and he had a memorable moment late in his career, with Minnesota, when he got caught with a contraband emery board on the mound and tried (unsuccessfully) to avoid detection by flinging it to the ground so that Kent Hrbek could plant his big ol’ grizzly bear foot on it. Joe Nuxhall (1944-66) is famous for a footnote – he pitched two-thirds of an inning at age 15, making him the youngest player in the history of modern baseball – and for his long career as a broadcaster, but that obscures the fact that he was a pretty fair pitcher. After he started his actual career at age 23, he won 135 games, almost all of them for the Reds, and he had some good seasons. He also hit 15 career home runs. The Reds discovered him when they were scouting his father to fill out their roster during World War II, and they decided to sign the kid instead. He sat the bench for quite a while and finally got into one game when Cincinnati was down 13-0 to the Cardinals. He was pitching alright until Stan Musial came up, and the 15-year-old pitcher fell apart. Jaime Navarro (1989-2000) won 116 games in his career. No, really. Navarro led the league in a statistical category eight times – once in losses, twice each in hits allowed, earned runs allowed and wild pitches, and once in batters faced. He wasn’t a great pitcher, but he could plug a hole. Jerry Nops (1896-1901) was a slightly above-average pitcher who 72-41 career record is mostly a testament to the fact that he played for a couple of great Baltimore teams around the turn of the century. Johnny Niggeling (1938-46) was a better pitcher than Jerry Nops, but he had a losing record because he played for the Browns and the Senators. Niggeling was a minor-league veteran (159 wins in the minors) who didn’t make it to the majors until his mid-30s.

Bullpen: Closer Joe Nathan (1999- ) was a decent 28-year-old setup man in San Francisco, but the Giants decided that they really needed A.J. Pierzynski, so they packaged Nathan with Francisco Liriano and Boof Bonser and traded them to Minnesota. Pierzynski played one year with the Giants, in which the most noteworthy thing he did was lead the NL in grounding into double plays. Nathan, meanwhile, became the Twins’ closer and in the ensuing six years he has saved 246 games with a 1.87 ERA and 11 strikeouts per nine innings. He missed 2010 with an injury but is getting back into things in 2011. (Liriano turned out to be pretty good, too, making the Pierzynski trade look that much worse.) Jeff Nelson (1992-2006) was a 6-foot-8 set-up man who stuck around until he was almost 40, and he was largely effective until his arm gave out – an underrated pitcher who struck out a batter an inning and didn’t allow many hits. He pitched in 55 postseason games with the Yankees and Mariners, with a 2.65 ERA, including a 1.69 ERA in 16 World Series games. Julio Navarro (1962-70), Jaime’s father, was nicknamed Whiplash, which could be a good thing (if it refers to the batter’s reaction to his curveball) or a bad thing (if it refers to the pitcher’s reaction to the home runs he gave up, and yes, Navarro did tend to feed the ol’ gopher). He was a very average reliever for six seasons. Joe Nelson (2001-10) spent all or parts of five seasons in the majors, each time with a different team. Jim Nash (1966-72) went 12-1 with a 2.06 ERA in 18 games as a 21-year-old rookie with the Kansas City A’s in 1966. For the remainder of his career he went 56-63 with a 3.78 ERA. Juan Nieves (1986-88) pitched a no-hitter at age 22 and had a career record of 32-25 when arm troubles ended his career at age 23. Jack Nabors (1915-17) had a career record of 1-25, but he grabs the mop-up role out of the bullpen in large part because of his name and because of his adjective-defying season in 1916 for a Philadelphia A’s team that had been decimated by defections to the Federal League and escalating salaries. The team was downright awful, and Nabors pitched as well as anyone else on the staff other than Bullet Joe Bush, but while the rest of the staff went 35-97, Nabors worked 212 innings and went 1-20. Ouch.

Bench: The catching platoon will always leave either Nolan or Newman on the bench. Outfielder Jim Nettles (1970-81) wasn’t as good as his brother Graig, and unlike Joe Niekro, he wasn’t almost as good either. Outfielder Joe Nossek (1964-70) batted .228 in his career. Infielder John Nelson (2006) went 0-for-5 with four strikeouts in his major-league career, but we need someone who can play the infielder after we pinch-hit for our other light-hitting infielders. First baseman Jim Nealon (1906-07) actually led the National League in RBI in 1906 with 83. He was 21 years old. He slumped off, went back to the minors and died at age 25. He’ll push Johnny Neun for the starting job at first base.

Manager: Jerry Narron was a big, slow catcher who couldn’t hit. He has managed the Rangers and the Reds, and while he had losing records with both teams, his record isn’t, like, a train wreck or anything, so he gets the managerial job over Neun.