HC: The Harrold Carswells

Infield: Prince Hal Chase (1905-19) was a stylish first baseman and inveterate ruffian during the rough-and-tumble era when gamblers and roustabouts threatened to sieze control of the sport. He was a .290 hitter who didn’t draw many walks or hit with any power, but the writers of his day described him as a fielder who left observers gasping for adjectives worthy of his brilliance. He was also a cad and a charmer, perhaps the central figure in the downward spiral that led to the fixing of the 1919 World Series. He was greedy and corrupt, and he seemed to have the ability to corrupt those around him and draw them into his various schemes. Many teammates fell under his charismatic spell, and many managers came to bitterly resent the influence he cast over any team that he played on. In 1910, playing for the New York Highlanders, Chase decided that he didn’t like manager George Stallings, who had taken over a miserable team and turned it into a winner. But Chase thought that he should have been manager, so he began throwing games to make his Stallings look bad. When the situation came to a head, the owner fired Stallings and made Chase the manager. He operated brazenly, bribing teammates and opponents while somehow earning the loyalty of enough people to keep himself around. He was ultimately banned for life, but not before he played a central role (perhaps the central role) in dragging baseball into a gutter of gamblers, criminals and cheats. His name is not well known to modern fans, but he was one of the most fascinating and (unfortunately) influential players of the deadball era. Third baseman Harlond Clift (1934-45) is another guy who modern fans don’t know, but he was a very good player. The historian Bill James refers to Clift as the first modern third baseman, marking the transition of that position from a “defense first” position into one that came to breed sluggers. Clift was not a bad defensive player, but he was a home run hitter in a time when third basemen were expected to be bunters and hit-and-run guys. He also drew 100 walks a year and put a ton of runs on the board, but he was never recognized for his skills in large part because he spent his career with the St. Louis Browns and the Washington Senators. Hughie Critz (1924-35) was a slick-fielding, weak-hitting second baseman for the Reds and Giants.In 1926, batting .270 for a second-place Cincinnati team, he impressed onlookers enough to finish second in the MVP voting, and two years later, batting .296 for a team that slipped to fifth place, he finished fourth in the voting. Clearly he made an impression, though his stats are hardly eye-catching today. Horace Clarke (1965-74) primarily played second base but he moves to his secondary position to play shortstop on this team. Clarke was a decent enough player, but he had the misfortune of arriving with the New York Yankees at the precise moment that the team marked (rather decisively) the end of its long period of dominance. The Babe Ruth Era had given way to the Joe DiMaggio Era which led to the Mickey Mantle Era, and through no fault of his own, the late 1960s became derisively known as the Horace Clarke Era. In truth, he was a similar player to Critz – good glove, not much offense but not a complete disaster at the plate, a little bit of speed – but where Critz got MVP votes, Clarke was held up as the symbol of the Yankees’ collapse.

Outfield: Left fielder Hub Collins (1886-92) was a .284 hitter who stole lots of bases and scored bunches of runs. In May of 1892, at age 28, he asked out of a game because he was not feeling well. He died a week later of typhoid fever. He was never a frontline star on the level of an Anson or a Lajoie, but he was a good player who might have put up some impressive numbers if he’d been lucky enough to have a full career. Center fielder Harry Craft (1937-42) was a .250 hitter who would hit a dozen home runs a year. He was a good defensive outfielder, but he never made it back to the majors after World War II. Right fielder Henry Cotto (1984-93), a.k.a. “Cotto the Swatto,” had great tools – he was fast and threw well – but he never produced much in the way of offense. He was never able to nail down a full-time job, but he would always get another shot at playing time because he just looked like he could play.

Catcher: Harry Chiti (1950-62) was a big, burly guy who made his major league debut at age 17 and hung around for a decade (interrupted by military service) as a part-time player. He earned his own little niche in the annals of baseball trivia in 1962 when the Indians traded him to the expansion Mets for a player to be named later. The Mets, after watching him bat .195 for a few weeks, told the Indians that Chiti himself would be the “player to be named later,” thus completing a deal in which Harry Chiti was traded for himself. (The team’s broadcasts will operate on an eight-second delay in case announcer Harry Caray mispronounces “Chiti.”)

Rotation: Howie Camnitz (1904-15) was a very fine pitcher for some very fine Pirates teams led by Honus Wagner. He won 20 games three times, including a 25-6 record for the 1909 world champions (though the Tigers lit him up in his one start in the World Series). He finished his career with a 133-106 record. Hal Carlson (1917-30) was also a teammate of Honus Wagner, pitching for the Pirates a few years after Camnitz. Carlson won 114 games in his career, split relatively evenly among Pittsburgh, Philadelphia and the Cubs. He was pitching for the Cubs at age 38 when he missed a couple of starts because he was not feeling well. Two weeks later, he collapsed and died of a hemhorrage. (Considering the deaths of Hub Collins and Hal Carlson, the team’s training staff will be instructed to rush any player to the hospital at the slightest sign of fever, nausea or general achiness.) Harry Coveleski (1907-18) made a big first impression. In 1907, at age 21, he worked four games in relief for Philadelphia and allowed just 10 hits and two runs (both unearned) in 20 innings. The following year, he beat the powerhouse Giants twice in stretch run, costing New York dearly in a tight pennant race that was ultimately won by the Cubs. Even so, Coveleski did not become a full-time starter until 1914 when he joined the Detroit Tigers rotation and proceeded to win 65 games in three years. He finished with an 81-55 career record, and he also had three 20-win seasons in the minors. He was a fine pitcher, but ultimately overshadowed by his younger brother, Hall of Famer Stan Coveleski. (The two brothers worked hard, with some cooperation from their managers, to never pitch against one another.) Harry Courtney (1919-22) was a tall drink o’water who hung around as a lefty with the Washington Senators for a few years but never did much to distinguish himself. Hugh Campbell (1873) made 18 starts for the Elizabeth Resolutes in the National Association. He won two games (the only two that his team won all season) and lost 16. When he wasn’t pitching, he would occasionally play infield, but he was a .150 hitter, so he didn’t stick around long.

Bullpen: Closer Hugh Casey (1935-49) was a fine reliever for the Brooklyn Dodgers, leading the NL twice in saves and winning quite a few games in relief as well. He was a heavy drinker who fancied himself as a macho man. One spring training, while in Cuba, he became friends with Ernest Hemingway, and they amused themselves by getting drunk in Hemingway’s basement, putting on boxing gloves and beating each other bloody. (From all reports, by the time they were done “boxing,” there was not a piece of furniture in the room that remained intact.) The alcoholism continued to get worse, and Casey committed suicide at age 37. Hector Carrasco (1994-2007) was an effective reliever but never a star for seven different teams. Howard Craghead (1931-33) had no record and a 6.26 ERA in 15 games for the Indians, but he is noteworthy for the facts that (a.) he won 200 games in the minors, and (b.) he was a lieutenant commander in the U.S. Navy during World War II. Harry Camnitz (1909-11) is Howie’s less successful brother. He was a career minor-leaguer who appeared in one game for Pittsburgh and two for the Cardinals. Henry Coppola (1935-36) pitched briefly for the Washington Senators. If he is any relation to the legendary movie family, history has not recorded it. Hap Collard (1927-30) pitched for a few years in Cleveland and Philadelphia and got roughed up pretty good. Henry Clarke (1897-98) was the son of a prominent Nebraska businessman, and for a couple of years he spent his summer break from college pitching for the Cleveland Spiders and the Chicago Cubs before moving on to a propserous career in law and business. His middle name was Tefft. Yes, with two F’s.

Bench: Shortstop Harry Chappas (1978-80) was a reserve shortstop for the White Sox. He was 5-foot-7, but as a publicity stunt team owner Bill Veeck listed him as 5-foot-3 and lots of publications fell for the ruse and did big stories on the little fellow (including a cover story in Sports Illustrated). Chappas was an interesting fellow – his hobbies included crafting model airplanes and raising finches – but he wasn’t a very good ballplayer. He was rushed to the majors at age 20 and finished by his mid-20s. His minor-league record suggests that he might have been a useful utility infielder if he hadn’t been promoted from Single-A to the majors as a publicity stunt. Third baseman Hector “Heity” Cruz (1973-82), younger brother of Jose Cruz, was a very good minor-league hitter who arrived in the majors amid much hype and then flopped badly, never even reaching .240 in his nine-year career. Hee-Seop Choi (2002-05) was a hulking first baseman from South Korea who signed with the Cubs, had a fine minor-league career and produced a bit of power for a few years in the majors. Howie Clark (2002-08) looked like he might be useful as a fourth outfielder, but he fizzled out pretty quickly, though he had some decent years in the minors into his late 30s. Hick Cady (1912-19) was a backup catcher who won three World Series titles with the Red Sox in the teens. There’s not a lot of difference between Hick Cady and Harry Chiti, so Cady will see his share of starts.

Manager: Harry Craft will be the player-manager. His managerial record (360-485) isn’t good, but then, he managed the Kansas City A’s and the expansion Houston Colt .45’s, so he didn’t have a lot to work with.

HH: The Haven Hamiltons

Infield: Highpockets Hudspeth was a big, strong Negro League first baseman. No indication on where his nickname came from, other than that he was 6-foot-6 and therefore had pockets that were higher than normal. Hudspeth was a slow-footed power hitter, a decent glove but immobile in the field. In his prime he was a very good hitter, but his prime was relatively short. Second baseman Harry Hinchman (1907) was a switch-hitter who played for two decades in the minors, collecting almost 2,300 hits and batting .260. His major-league career consisted of a couple of weeks in Cleveland. Third baseman Harry Hanebrink (1953-59) was a bit player on the Milwaukee Braves teams that won two pennants in the late 1950s. Shortstop Hob Hiller (1920-21) played briefly for the post-Ruth Red Sox.

Outfield: Right fielder Harry Heilmann (1914-32) played alongside Cobb in Detroit as part of one of history’s greatest outfields. Heilmann’s .342 career average is one of the best of all time, and he was good for 40 doubles a year (as well as a double-figures in triples and home runs). He won four AL batting titles – every odd-numbered year between 1921-27. Like Heilmann, center fielder Harry Hooper (1909-25) is in the Hall of Fame, but they were very different types of players. Hooper was a great defensive outfielder and a steady but unspectacular hitter. He played right field for much of his career, but only because he was sharing the Boston outfield with Tris Speaker. Hooper is the only player in history to win four World Series titles with the Red Sox. For his career, he batted .281, but he had only moderate power and slightly above-average speed. Left fielder Harvey Hendrick (1923-34) batted .308 for his career, during a high-average era. He had decent line-drive power. He bounced around the league, playing for seven teams in 11 seasons, and most of his career was as a part-time player.

Catcher: Hughie Hearn (1901-03) was a pretty decent catcher who played for Brooklyn but was always in a role backing up an established veteran. He was essentially a .280-.290 hitter, both in his short major-league career and his longer minor-league career.

Rotation: Harvey Haddix (1952-65) is famous for pitching one of the greatest games in history. On May 6, 1959, pitching for the Pirates, he worked 12 perfect innings but was still stuck in a scoreless tie with Milwaukee. In the 13th, he lost the perfecto and the game, but the performance remains legendary. That game remains his legacy, the first thing people think of when they heard Haddix’s name, but he was actually a good pitcher for a long time. He won 136 games, mostly for the Cardinals and the Pirates, and in the 1960 World Series he was the winning pitcher in Game 5 (starter) and Game 7 (reliever). Harry Harper (1913-23) was known as “Hackensack Harry,” after his hometown in New Jersey. He spent most of his career with the Senators, which led to a career record of 57-76 despite an ERA that was better than league average. His reward was to spent 1921 with the pennant-winning Yankees. Harper was in the majors at age 18 and out of baseball by 30, at which point he embarked on a very successful career in business and politics (though he ultimately came up short in a U.S. Senate election in 1948 and a Congressional election two years later). Hardie Henderson (1883-88) lost 32 games in 1883 and then, to prove it wasn’t a fluke, he lost 35 in 1885. OK, so, losing 30 games in a season wasn’t all that rare in the 1880s. Still, there weren’t a lot of guys who did it twice. Henderson was a fairly average pitcher who finished his career 81-121 because, like Harry Harper, he pitched for bad teams. Harry Howell (1898-1910) bounced around for a few years before settling in with the St. Louis Browns. He finished with a career record of 131-146 and an ERA of 2.74. He never won 20 games in a season, but he lost 20 three times. Harry Hulihan (1922) came home from World War I and pitched a handful of games for the Boston Braves in 1922. He was a 23-year-old lefty, and he pitched very well (3.15 ERA in 40 innings for a terrible team in a league where the average ERA was 4.10). He hurt his arm, kicked around the semipro ranks for a while without ever playing in the minors, and then retired in his mid-20s and spent the rest of his life selling real estate and insurance. We suspect that Harry Harper and Harry Hulihan will be business partners in the offseason (Harry & Harry Inc., a consulting firm).

Bullpen: Hal Haid (1919-33) saved five games for the Cardinals in 1928. That was enough to lead the National League, and it's enough to make him the H.H. closer. Haid finished his career with a dozen saves. Haid pitched one game for the Browns at age 21, then pitched in the minors for severals years before resurfacing with the Cardinals at age 30. After a few years in the bigs, he went back to the minors and pitched until he was 40, finishing with 139 minor-league wins. Herb Hutson (1974) pitched in 20 games for the Cubs. Not much of a big-league career, but he did a decent job of getting people out (3.45 ERA, 22 strikeouts in 28 2/3 innings). Hal Haydel (1970-71) had a 6-2 record and, yes, one save in his brief career in Minnesota. Homer Hillebrand (1905-08) could actually count as two players, partly because his full name was Homer Hiller Henry Hillebrand and partly because he was both a hitter and a pitcher. In truth, he wasn’t much of a hitter, for which reason he washed out as a first baseman in his early 20s, but as a pitcher he had a couple of pretty good years for the Pirates. Harry Hoch (1908-15) was a minor-league starter who pitched well in three starts for the Phillies in 1908 but didn’t stick, so he went back to the minors and resurfaced with the St. Louis Browns a few years later to go 0-6 primarily as a reliever. His durability will make him valuable in the exceedingly thin H.H. pen. Herm Holshouser (1930) pitched a few games for the St. Louis Browns in which the league batted about .350 against him, which led to a 7.80 ERA. Hilly Hathaway (1992-93) was a tall lefty who pitched very well in the minors but got hit hard when the Angels gave him a dozen starts in his early 20s. He went back to the minors and struggled, and he was out of baseball before he turned 30. If Hathaway struggles, there is a crowded field of guys who appeared in fewer than five games, including guys like Harry Hedgpeth, Herb Hippauf, Hanson Horsey, Harley Hisner, Heath Haynes and Horace Heimbold ready to step in and hurl.

Bench: Ham Hyatt (1909-18) was an outfielder and first baseman who batted a respectable .267 during the deadball era. He will compete for playing time with Harvey Hendrick, but there’s no possibility of platoons since they are both lefty hitters (as is Highpockets Hudspeth at first base). Heine Heitmuller (1909-10) was a big, strapping outfielder who played well in a couple of extended trials with the Philadelphia A’s but couldn’t crack their formidable lineup. He returned to the minors and was leading the Pacific Coast League in batting in 1912 when he died of typhoid fever. Hugh High (1913-18), another outfielder, was a decent hitter (though not as good as his brother Andy), and he was a part-time starter for the pre-Ruth Yankees. Herb Hunter (1916-21) couldn’t hit, but he beats out Heine Heltzel and Hunter Hill for the utility infield spot in part because he has the distinction of organizing some of the first barnstorming trips that took American players to Japan, helping to popularize the sport there. His tours included major stars such as Lou Gehrig, Lefty Grove and Mickey Cochrane. Hub Hart (19905-07) was the backup catcher for some very good White Sox teams, including the World Series champions of 1906. If one of the backup outfielders gets injured, we would look forward to the pitched battle between Hinky Haines and Hunky Hines for the last roster spot.

Manager: Holly Hollingshead had a career record of 16-66 in two partial seasons managing the Washington Nationals in the 19th century. He was just 22 years old when he led the team in 1875 but he went just 4-16. They gave him another shot in 1884 at age 31, but the results weren’t much better.

HM: The Henry Mancinis

Infield: First baseman Hal Morris (1988-2000) was a consistent run producer for the Reds in the 1990s. He was a career .304 hitter who made good contact and had some line-drive pop but not much actual power. Third baseman Hank Majeski (1939-55) was also a consistent but unspectacular player – sure-handed at the hot corner, never struck out, good for some doubles and the occasional home run. He bounced around the American League for more than a decade, and in his best season he batted .312 for the A’s in 1948 with 120 RBI. Other than that season, his career high in RBI was 72. Third baseman Heinie Mueller (1938-41) was a decent-at-best player for the Phillies, but he never made it back to the majors after he returned from World War II in his early 30s. Shortstop Harvey McClellan (1919-24) was a weak-hitting infielder for the White Sox. Actually, weak-hitting doesn’t really do justice to his weaknesses at the plate. He was nicknamed “Little Mac” a few decades before McDonald’s introduced the big one.

Outfield: Awfully good outfield here, with one qualifier – positioning is going to be an issue, as none of the three is a natural center fielder, to put it mildly. As a youngster, Hal McRae (1968-87) had good speed and was projected as a center fielder, but a badly broken leg ended all of that. He spent a few years playing corner outfield part time on the teams that formed the basis for the Big Red Machine, and then in 1973 he was traded to Kansas City and became the first great designated hitter. He batted .300 regularly, bashed doubles all over the place and ran the bases so aggressively that they had to make rule changes to keep him from putting opposing infielders in the hospital. He was a hustling, fiery player who was one of the key figures on the Kansas City Royals teams that dominate the AL West for a decade. Heine Manush (1923-39) played during a time (and place) of very high offensive totals, and he took advantage. His career batting average was .330, and he led the American League in batting once, and hits and doubles twice apiece. He broke in with Detroit as a kid battling for time in the great outfield that included Cobb, Heilmann and Veach. He spent most of his career with the Tigers and the Senators, but he spent time with four other teams. Hideki Matsui (2003- ) went from being a legend in Japan to being a fixture in New York. As a rookie with the Yomiuri Giants, he was so highly touted that he was assigned the number 55, which represents Sadaharu Oh’s single-season home run record. He was also given the nickname “Godzilla” – at first it was an unkind refence to his acne problem (which must have been pretty bad), but soon it was transformed into a tribute to his physique and his strength. After nine years with Yomiuri, including three MVP awards and three league championships, he made international headlines when he signed with the New York Yankees. He became a regular 100-RBI guy and a respected slugger in the Yankees’ star-studded lienup. In 56 postseason games, he has hit .312 and slugged .541, winning the World Series MVP Award in 2009. Thee very fine outfielders here – but what to do with them? If McRae’s injury had happened in mid-career, like with Andre Dawson’s knees, we could pencil him in at center field and let it go. But it didn’t, and as a result none of the three has any real claims to center field. Matsui played a fair number of games there, both in Japan and in his early days with the Yankees, so he’ll start out there, but he’s not going to win any Gold Gloves. With Manush in left and McRae in right, the pitching staff is going to want to keep the ball low.

Catcher: Harry McCurdy (1922-34) was a decent enough hitter for a long time, though he never got much beyond part-time status. Playing with four teams, he was a .280 hitter with enough gap power to hit a lot of doubles.

Rotation: Harry McIntire (1905-13) spent the bulk of his career with some really terrible Brooklyn Superbas teams, for which he went 46-98 despite pitching just a little bit worse than league average. In 1910 he benefited greatly from a trade to the outstanding Chicago Cubs teams, for whom he pitched about the same but posted a record of 25-18 in three seasons. Handsome Hugh McQuillan (1918-27) also benefited from a trade in mid-career – going from the Boston Braves to the New York Giants in 1922, leading to three straight pennants. He finished with a career record of 88-94. Heine Meine (1922-34) goes on the list, along with guys such as Johnny Dickshot and Dick Pole, of ballplayers whose names would make Beavis & Butthead snicker. After one game with his hometown St. Louis Browns in 1922, he spent several years as a minor-league Meine before resurfacing with the Pirates at age 33. He went on to go 66-50 for Pittsbugh, leading the NL with 19 victories in 1931. Harry McCormick (1879-83) went 18-33 for Syracuse in 1879, partly because he didn’t pitch very well, but also partly because his team was last in the league in runs per game. Over the course of his career, he wasn’t half bad. Hugh Mulcahy (1935-47) pitched for some absolutely dreadful Philadelphia Phillies teams, and from 1937-40 he went 40-78. During this period, he received one of the great nicknames in baseball history. Because so many box scores included the line “Losing pitcher-Mulcahy,” the poor guy became known as Hugh “Losing Pitcher” Mulcahy. He had a career record of 45-89, even though his ERA was only a little bit worse than league average.

Bullpen: Hal McKain (1927-32) will start out as the closer, but his grasp is tenuous in this highly flammable bullpen. He had a career record of 18-23 with six saves and a 4.93 ERA, mostly for the White Sox. Hector Mercado (2000-03) was a lefty who went 5-4 with one save during a short career with the Reds and Phillies. Heath Murray (1997-2002) might wrest the “Losing Pitcher” nickname away from Hugh Mulcahy (or at the very least become known as Heath “Blown Save” Murray), based on his 2-15 career record. He earned that record with a 6.41 ERA and almost 17 baserunners per nine innings. Herb Moford (1955-62) won 143 games in the minors. In the majors he was 5-13 with a 5.03 ERA and finally hung it up after the idignity of pitching for the expansion Mets. He was a teammate of Jim Bunning’s and later, after retiring to his Kentucky tobacco farm, worked on some of Bunning’s political campaigns. Hank McDonald (1931-33) had the good fortune of coming up with the powerhouse Philadelphia A’s and the bad fortune of then getting traded to the awful St. Louis Browns. Herb McQuaid (1923-26) had a short career that ended with the ’26 Yankees, but he did not appear in the legendary World Series that ended with Grover Cleveland Alexander and the Cardinals beating the Bombers. Hal Manders (1941-46) was a cousin (and youth baseball teammate) of Bob Feller. He was a promising young pitcher who served a long apprenticeship in the Cardinals’ farm system and then had some success in the majors before World War II interrupted. When he came back from the war, he didn’t last long.

Bench: Hi Myers (1909-25) was a fleet center fielder who is going to get plenty of time as a defensive replacement on this team. He was a decent hitter, too, leading the NL in triples twice and in slugging and RBI in 1919 while playing for Brooklyn. Outfielder Herbie Moran (1908-15) was a 5-foot-5 speedster who played for the Miracle Braves of 1914. Herschel Martin (1937-45) is another outfielder, one who had almost 2,300 hits in the minors for a .317 average. In the majors, he batted .285 as a part-time player for the Yankees and Phillies. Utility infielder Hal Marnie (1940-42) couldn’t hit, but he is the only player in major-league history whose name is also the title of a Hitchcock film. (If you include nicknames, Steve “Psycho” Lyons and Bob "Rope" Boyd qualify, and I'm all in favor of trying to popularize such nicknames as Royce "Topaz" Ring, Aaron "Lifeboat" Laffey or Kevin "Frenzy" Frandsen. It's probably too late for Richie "Family Plot" Hebner.). Backup catcher Henry Mercedes (1992-97) went four for five as a rookie with the A’s, but everyone was pretty sure he wasn’t really an .800 hitter. They were right. He was a .247 hitter with no power.

Manager: Hal McRae's managerial career is intriguing. He was a very respected player in Kansas City, and as the sun began to set on the glory days of the George Brett Era, McRae was hired as manager to turn the team back into a winner. He did that, with three winning records in four seasons and a combined mark of 286-277. But his intense manner rubbed some people the wrong way – players, bosses, media members, etc. – and he was fired after taking the Royals to a 64-51 record in the strike season of 1994. Since then, in almost two decades, the Royals have gone through a series of managers and had just one winning season. McRae spent a couple of futile years in Tampa Bay and has worked as a hitting coach, but there are those in K.C. who wonder what might have happened if the Royals had kept McRae in the dugout.

HR: The Harry Reasoners

Infield: Shortstop Hanley Ramirez (2005- ) is one of the most exciting young players in the game today. He’s won a Rookie of the Year, been runner-up for an MVP, led the National League in batting and runs scored, and he’s just now hitting his prime. He’s a .300 hitter with power and enough speed to steal a lot of bases at a very high rate of success, and defensively, while he’s no Gold Glover, he’s good enough that no one is talking about moving him off the position. He is so firmly entrenched as the face of the Florida Marlins franchise that there are probably a lot of people who forget that he came up with the Red Sox and moved to Florida as the key player in the mutually beneficial deal that brought Josh Beckett to Boston. Third baseman Hardy Richardson (1879-92) was one of the early stars of the sport. His full name was Abram Harding Richardson, and he was known as “Old True Blue.” He played his prime years in Buffalo and Detroit, though he was with Boston when he led the Players League with 146 RBI in 1890. Second baseman Harold Reynolds (1983-94) was nowhere near as explosive or talented as HanRam, but he could be an exciting player. He is the answer to a trivia question: Who was the only person other than Rickey Henderson to lead the AL in stolen bases during the 1980s? (Reynolds stole 60 in 1987; Henderson was hurt and stole just 41 bases in 95 games.) He spent a decade as a speedster with a good glove and a mediocre bat, and he won many awards for community service, including being named one of George Bush’s “Points of Light.” Upon retirement, he moved on to a broadcasting career at ESPN that ended abruptly amid charges of sexual harassment. First baseman Herman Reich (1949) is the weak link on this infield. A career minor-leaguer, he spent one itinerant year in the majors at age 31. The Indians claimed him after he had a big year in the Pacific Coast League in the fall of 1948 and then waived him at the end of spring training 1949. The Senators claimed him off the waiver wire, gave him two pinch-hitting appearances, then shipped him back to Cleveland, where he appeared in one game an outfielder before he was waived again. The Cubs claimed him this time and he played part time as a first baseman and outfielder for the reason of the year. The following winter, the Cubs sold him to the White Sox, and he was released and returned to the minors for good.

Outfield: Center fielder Harry Rice (1923-33) played for the St. Louis Browns in the early years of the “Live Ball Era,” when the Browns actually had some good teams. He was a .300 hitter with a little bit of line drive pop, but his career fizzled out in his late 20s. Right fielder Henry Rodriguez (1992-2002) hit 119 home runs between 1996-99, but just 41 home runs in the rest of his career. He was an all-star in Montreal in 1996, and he batted behind Sammy Sosa the year Sosa hit 66 jacks for the Cubs. For a while, it was traditional for fans to throw “Oh Henry!” candy bars on the field after he hit home runs, but that practice ended when they started filing criminal charges against the fans for doing so. Hal “Hoot” Rice (1948-54) would not crack the starting outfield for the all-Rice team (Sam, Harry and Jim Ed), but he gets the nod in left field here. He primarily backed up Stan Musial on the postwar Cardinals.

Catcher: Harvey Russell (1914-15) was a backup for a couple of years in the Federal League.

Rotation: Harry Rasmussen (1975-83) was sort of an odd case. He was born Harold Ralph Rasmussen, but a few years into his major-league career he decided to legally change his name to Eric. If memory serves, he did this in order to reflect his pride in his Scandinavian heritage. Oddly enough, when he became father he named his son … Harry. For initial purposes, we’re giving Harry Rasmussen credit for his entire career, regardless of the name change. He pitched primarily for the Cardinals during their 1970s malaise, and he finished with a career record of 50-77. Lefty Hank Robinson (1911-18) won 273 games in the minors and, in the middle of that career, also managed to go 42-37 in the bigs with a 2.53 ERA. Horacio Ramirez (2003- ) had a spot in the Atlanta Braves rotation for a few years, alongside the likes of Smoltz, Maddux and Hudson. He couldn’t hang with that company, so he's bounced around as a lefty reliever for the past several years. Howie Reed (1958-71) was a very good starter in the minors and spent more than a decade bouncing up and down as a fairly decent swingman in the majors. He pitched for the 1965 World Series champion Dodgers. Humberto Robinson (1955-60) was, like Howie Reed, a very good starter in the minors who never fully established himself as a starter in the majors but spent a lot of time as a very good swingman. He was the first Panamanian to play in the majors, a tall, skinny stringbean. It’s worth noting that Hank Robinson, Howie Reed and Humberto Robinson combined to go 76-79 in the majors, but 522-364 in the minors.

Bullpen: Closer Hal Reniff (1961-67), affectionately known as “Porky,” pitched for the Yankees at the end of the Mantle-Berra-Ford era, which is to say at the end of the dynasty that stretched across four decades. He pitched in two World Series, allowing no runs in four relief appearances, but the Yankees were on the losing end both times. He finished his career with 45 saves. Hank Ritter (1912-16) sounds like a country singer but he was actually a relief pitcher who had a short and mostly ineffective career with the New York Giants. Hector Ramirez (1999-2000) also had a short career in which he did little to distinguish himself. Venezuelan righty Henry Rodriguez (2009- ) is a young guy who came up with Oakland and now pitches for Washington. He’s just now getting started, but it wouldn’t take much for him to move up the hierarchy of the H.R. bullpen. Hans Rasmussen (1915) is no relation to Harry (or Eric). He was a 6-foot-6, 220-pound behemoth who pitched a couple of innings for the Chicago Whales in the Federal League as a 20-year-old and then disappeared from the baseball landscape. Hal Raether (1954-57) pitched two innings for the Philadelphia A’s in 1954 and then came back to pitch two more innings for the Kansas City A’s in 1957. Charles Finley apparently resisted the temptation to bring him back to work two innings in Oakland in 1968.

Bench: Infielder Heine Reitz (1893-99) played on the rough-and-tumble Orioles teams who dominated the NL in the late 19th century. His 31 triples in 1894 was the single-season record for many years and is still the second-highest total. In 1914, Reitz had the distinction of becoming the first major-league player to die in a car accident. Backup catcher Hank Riebe (1942-49) was a terrible hitter, but then, you knew that when you saw that he couldn’t beat out Harvey Russell for the starting job. Hal Rhyne (1926-33) was a weak-hitting utility infielder for the Red Sox and Pirates. Harry Raymond (1888-92) was also a weak-hitting infielder. He was born Harry H . Truman. There is no indication of (a.) why he changed his name or (b.) if he was any relation to the future president. Completing the team’s collection of infielders, Hector Rodriguez (1952) was a Cuban third baseman who started for the White Sox in 1952 but other than that spent his professional career collecting more than 2,300 hits in various minor leagues in the U.S. and Mexico. Henri Rondeau (1913-16) came up as a catcher but later moved to the outfield, which is where he’ll play on this team. He never did anything noteworthy, other than being apparently the only player named Henri in major-league history.

Manager: According to baseballreference.com and retrosheet.org, no H.R. has ever managed or coached in the majors. For now, we'll let Heinie Reitz manage the team, hoping that he will benefit from his proximity to Ned Hanlon, John McGraw and Uncle Robby during his playing career.

HS: The Harold Stassens

Infield: Harry Steinfeldt (1898-1911) arrives in the consciousness of most baseball fans as the answer to a trivia question: Who was the third baseman in the “Tinker to Evers to Chance” infield? He was a decent enough hitter and fielder, a starter on the great Chicago Cubs teams that were the first dynasty of the 20th century. After eight years in Cincinnati, Steinfeldt arrived in Chicago in 1906, led the NL in hits and RBI, and played in four World Series between 1906-10. He batted .471 in the 1907 Series, leading the Cubs to their first championship (though the pitching staff also played a role, allowing just six runs in five games). First baseman Howie Schultz (1943-48) was a 6-foot-6 guy who was nicknamed “Stretch” and “Steeple.” After an undistinguished baseball career, he played for a few years in the NBA as a teammate of George Mikan in Minneapolis. Second baseman Heine Smith (1897-1903) was a pretty ordinary player, but he does have the distinction of being John McGraw’s predecessor as manager of the New York Giants. Shortstop Heine Sand (1923-28) gives us two Heines in the infield, neither one of whom could hit. (For the record, there have been almost two dozen men named Heine who have played in the majors, but none since the retirement of Heine Manush in 1939. Many people confuse Heine Peitz with Heine Reitz, though they are in fact two different guys. In St. Louis, a youth ballfield is named in honor of Heine Meine. Now let’s wrap up the “Beavis & Butt-Head” snickering and move on.)

Outfield: Left fielder Hank Sauer (1941-59) was a tremendous slugger who didn’t stick in the majors until he was 31 years old because of (a.) military service, (b.) concerns about his egregious defense, and (c.) the pigheadedness of team management in Cincinnati that was convinced, despite all evidence to the contrary, that Sauer’s prowess as a minor-league power hitter would not translate to the majors so they would rather use guys who they already knew couldn’t hit. Finally Sauer hit 50 home runs and slugged .668 in Triple-A at age 30 and the Reds said “OK, OK … “ He hit 286 of his 288 career home runs after the age of 31, and he won the NL MVP in 1951 when he led the league in home runs and RBI while playing for the Cubs. He was a bad defensive player, but the man could hit. Center fielder Harry Stovey (1880-93) was a great hitter, too. In fact, when he retired he was baseball’s career home run leader (with 122) until Roger Connor took that title from him a couple of years later. Playing his best years in Philadelphia, he regularly lead the American Association in homers, triples, runs, slugging percentage and other stats. Right fielder Homer Summa (1920-30) was a .300 hitter in a time when everyone hit .300. In fact, Hardball Times reports that Summa held, lost, and recently regained a career record – among all players with a .300 career average in 3,000 or more plate appearances, Summa had the lowest career OPS+ figure (92), which measures overall offensive effectiveness. Juan Pierre has supplanted him in this regard for a while, with an OPS+ below 90, but now that his career record dropped below .300, he no longer qualifies. It's Summa's record again.

Catcher: Hank Severeid (1911-26) started for a decade for the St. Louis Browns. He apparently loved to play catcher, and he was legendarily tough. This explains why he was able to play almost 1,400 games in the majors – and another 1,300 in the minors, pretty much all of them behind the plate. Decent enough hitter, nothing special, but the man was durable.

Rotation: Hilton Smith was one of the great pitchers in the history of the Negro Leagues, one of the guys in contention for the title of Best Negro League Pitcher Who Wasn’t Satchel Paige. In fact, he and Paige were teammates on the Kansas City Monarchs, though Smith’s quiet demeanor was a stark contrast to Paige’s outgoing nature. Smith won 20 games regularly, including a 25-1 record in 1941, and hit .300 in several different seasons. Hal Schumacher (1931-46) was a good, and very consistent, starter for the New York Giants. He won 61 games between 1933-35, and then he went seven consecutive seasons with between 11-13 victories. He was a good hitter (15 career home runs) and had some memorable starts in his three World Series – in Game 5 of the 1936 Series, he pitched a 10-inning complete game for the victory, highlighted by the third inning when, with the bases loaded and nobody out, he struck out DiMaggio and Gehrig, then got Dickey to fly out. You already know the story of Cleveland lefty Herb Score (1955-62). He won 16 games at age 22, then won 20 at age 23, leading the American League in strikeouts both seasons. In his first five starts of the 1957 season, he was pitching great – until he took a line drive in the face. He was never the same. He was 38-20 with a 2.63 ERA before the line drive in the face, 17-26 with a 4.43 ERA after – as such, he remains a legend for what could have been. Harry Staley (1888-95) won 136 games in the 19th century. He had a couple of 20-win seasons, but then again, at the time he pitched you pretty much had to win 30 to lead the league. Harry Salisbury (1879-82) won 20 games in 1882, but then again … see the previous sentence.

Bullpen: Closer Huston Street (2005- ) won the AL Rookie of the Year Award at age 21 and now has more than career saves an an average of more than a strikeout per inning. He has made the transition from Oakland to Colorado and is still pitching well. Heathcliff Slocumb (1991-2000) also did some closing while bouncing around eight teams in 10 years. Not a bad pitcher, but it is probably his fate to be remembered as the guy who the Red Sox traded to Seattle in order to get Derek Lowe and Jason Varitek, thus helping to set the stage for the Removal of the Curse of the Bambino. Harry Smythe (1929-34) pitched 4,300 innings in the minors and won 301 games. In the majors, he had a career ERA of 6.40 and a career winning percentage of .294, which is not good at all. (Now, if he had .640 winning percentage and a 2.94 ERA, he’d be onto something.) Hal Smith (1932-35) pitched a few years for the Pirates and wasn’t too bad. Herm Starrette (1963-65) pitched well in the minors, and during his brief tenure with the Orioles he pitched well, too. He was out of baseball by age 28, presumably because of injuries, but he had a long career as a pitching coach (won a World Series ring with the 1980 Phillies) and as a front office assistant to Dan Duquette. Harry “ Pop” Shriver (1922-23) was another guy who was effective in a short major-league career. Harry Shuman (1942-44) was a pretty decent minor-league pitcher who logged a few big-league innings during World War II.

Bench: Outfielder Harry Simpson (1951-59) wasn’t a bad player. He led the league in triples twice, drove in 100 runs, played in an all-star game. But he is fixed in our collective memory as “Suitcase” Simpson, the guy who got traded so often that, as the saying goes, he lived out of his suitcase. Harry Spilman (1978-89) was a utility infielder who was a backup on some good teams. Heine Schuble (1927-36) is another utility infielder, and we’ve already made enough Heine jokes. Howie Shanks (1912-25) started in the Washington Senators’ outfield for more than a decade, despite a lack of any kind of consistent production. The backup catcher is Hal Smith, who played from the mid-1950s until the mid-1960s. Actually, there were two of them. It’s probably Hal Smith (1955-64), who bounced around five teams, won a World Series title with the 1960 Pirates, and three times hit double-digits in home runs. But maybe it’s Hal Smith (1956-65), who w as a weaker hitter and had a much shorter career with the Cardinals but did manage to play in two all-star games.

Manager: Haywood Sullivan was a weak-hitting catcher and had an unsuccessful stint managing the Kansas City A’s in 1965, but he made his mark in the front office of the Red Sox, serving as general manager and part owner from 1978-83. He took over a very good team, which then went downhill, though how much of it was Sullivan’s fault is open to discussion. He did trade guys like Fred Lynn and Rick Burleson, and he did let Carlton Fisk walk via free agency, and he did bring in a lot of older players who had been stars several years earlier. Most notoriously, he convinced the Red Sox to take his son, Marc, in the second round of the 1979 draft and then promoted him through the minors despite the fact that the kid couldn’t hit, finally giving him a lengthy trial in the majors in which he batted .186 with no power and a 5-to-1 strikeout-to-walk ratio. Because Marc Sullivan does not have the initials “HS,” we are assuming he won’t unexpectedly turn up on this team while our backs are turned.

HW: The Hank Williams (Seniors)

Infield: Shortstop Honus Wagner (1897-1917) is on the short list of the greatest players of all time, maybe second only to Babe Ruth. A brilliant hitter, baserunner, fielder and team leader, he was part of the inaugural class inducted into the National Baseball Hall of Fame (along with Ruth, Cobb, Mathewson and Walter Johnson). He was a big, strong man with enormous hands, and at his peak with the Pittsburgh Pirates, he utterly dominated the National League. Unfortunately, he is little remembered today by casual fans – compared to Ruth or Cobb or Gehrig, for example – and many know him primarily as the guy who refused to have his baseball card inserted in packets of tobacco. The card was discontinued, and because of its rarity the few cards that remain in good condition are worth millions of dollars at auction. Second baseman Heine Wagner (1902-18) was a fine defensive shortstop who will move to second in order to accommodate The Flying Dutchman at short. Heinie Wagner was your basic .250-.260 hitter and spent most of his career with the Red Sox around the time Babe Ruth was arriving on the scene. Fightin’ Harry Wolverton (1898-1912) was a third baseman who bounced around the National League for a decade. First baseman Harry Williams (1913-14) had a short and undistinguished career.

Outfield: Left fielder Harry “The Hat” Walker (1940-55) was a slap hitter who out of nowhere batted .363 to lead the NL in 1947. A year earlier, though he only batted .236 during the regular season, he earned a spot in baseball history by getting the winning hit in Game 7 of the World Series (though the play is mostly remembered for Enos Slaughter’s mad dash from first to home). After he was done playing, he had a decent run as a manager and as a hitting coach. Center fielder Hack Wilson (1923-34) had a five-year run, from 1926-30 with the Cubs, in which he batted .331 with 177 home runs and 708 RBI. He ended that run by going .356-56-191 in 1930. He was a short, barrel-chested man who batted cleanup behind a bunch of little quick guys who got on base, and for a few years he was devastating. He drank heavily and died young, but until someone drives in 192 runs his place in baseball history will be secure. Right fielder Harry Wolter (1907-17) was a star in the Pacific Coast League and also a pretty decent player for the Red Sox and Yankees in the majors. He coached Stanford for two decades after his retirement.

Catcher: Hal Wagner was a .248 hitter who had enough going for him that he played in two all-star games. He came up with the Philadelphia A’s after the franchise had bottomed out, and he later played for the 1946 Red Sox team that lost to the Cardinals on Harry Walker’s hit in 1946.

Rotation: Hooks Wiltse (1904-15) was a deadball lefty who threw a no-hitter, won 20 games twice, and finished with a career record of 139-90 and a 2.47 ERA. He was nicknamed “Hooks” in honor of his big-breaking curveball. He had a brother named “Snake” who also played in the majors (and we’re not going to ask what “Snake’s” nickname refers to), but he was apparently no relation to Hal “Whitey” Wiltse (1926-31), a lefty who came along a generation later. Hal Wiltse was nowhere near as good – in fact, he won 20 games in his entire career – but it’s enough to land him on the back end of t his rotation. Hank Wyse (1942-51) was also nicknamed “Hooks,” and probably for the same reason. He was a righty who spent most of his career with the Cubs, winning 22 games in 1945 and finishing with a career record of 79-70. Herm Wehmeier (1945-58) was a Cincinnati native who turned down football scholarships in order to sign with his hometown Reds and who later, as a scout, encouraged the team to sign a kid who went to his old high school – a kid named Pete Rose. In between Wehmeier won 92 games but never mastered his control, leading the NL three times in walks and twice in wild pitches but never striking out very many batters. Highball Wilson (1899-1904), whose real name was Howard so he qualifies for this team via both his nickname and his given name, was a decent pitcher but the only time he had a regular spot in a rotation it was with an awful Washington Senators team so he went 7-18. From his nickname, we’re guessing he was a drinker, so we’ll try to keep him away from Hack Wilson and steer him toward Harry the Hat, who was something of a teetotaler.

Bullpen: Knuckleballer Hoyt Wilhelm (1952-72) was the first relief pitcher elected to the Hall of Fame. He won 100 games in the minors before finally making it to the majors, and as a 29-year-old rookie he pitched in 71 games for the Giants, going 15-3 and leading the league with a 2.43 ERA. (The Orioles decided to make him a starter at age 36, and he responded by leading the league in ERA again before returning to the bullpen.) Despite the late start on his career, he became the first pitcher ever to appear in 1,000 games – in large part because he remained effective into his late 40s and was put out to pasture just two weeks before his 50th birthday. In his career he won 143 games, saved 227 and had a 2.52 ERA. He was an absolutely dreadful hitter (.088 lifetime) but did managed to hit a home run in his first at-bat. It was the only home run of his career, and one of just five extra-base hits he managed in 493 plate appearances. Hal Woodeshick (1956-67) will work as a lefty set-up man to Wilhelm. Woodeshick pitched for six different teams, having some very good seasons and leading the NL in saves in 1964. Hal White (1941-54), the righty setup man, spent most of his career with Detroit and was generally a good pitcher. Hank Webb (1972-77) was a tall, skinny guy who spent most of his career in the minors but frequently got called up to the bigs for short stretches. He pitched for the pennant-winning ’73 Mets and ’77 Dodgers but did not make the postseason roster either time. Huyler Westervelt (1894) had a 5.04 ERA for the Giants in his only season, but that was better than the league average ERA, and besides that, he has a great name. Hank Winston (1933-36) never did get many hitters out, and he walked twice as many as he struck out. Hi West (1905-11) won 139 games in the minors but had a brief, undistinguished career in the majors – he pitched six games in 1905 and 13 games in 1911, but none in between.

Bench: Outfielder Herm Winningham (1984-93) was good enough if he was cast as a fourth or fifth outfielder, but he never really hit enough to justify starting for any period of time. Hub Walker (1931-45), a reserve center fielder like Winningham, hung around for a few years and occasionally played alongside his brother Gee. Backup catcher Howard Wakefield (1905-07) wasn’t very good, but his son Dick Wakefield was a very promising outfielder before World War II altered the path of his career. Herbert Welch (1925) was a diminutive shortstop who batted .318 in the minors but only played 13 games in the bigs. Likewise, Harry Welchonce (1911) was an outfielder who batted .321 in the minors but only got the briefest of shots in the majors. Sadly, there is no room on the roster for Herb Washington, the novelty player who was employed by Charles O. Finely's Athletics as a full-time pinch-runner.

Manager: Harry Wright was one of the originators of what we now call Major League Baseball, the man who organized the 1869 Cincinnati Red Stockings and therefore “invented” professional baseball. He was an outfielder and also a decent enough pitcher that he might decide to give himself a few innings out of the bullpen here. But mostly, he will manage. He won 1,225 games in his caeer with a .581 winning percentage and six league titles.

JA: The Jack Ankersons

Infield: First baseman Joe Adcock (1950-66) was a big, brawny fellow who hit prodigious home runs. He was a teammate of Eddie Mathews and Hank Aaron with the Milwaukee Braves, and he hit the walk-off home run that ended Harvey Haddix’s legendary perfect game. In one game in 1954, he hit four home runs and a double, and the 18 total bases stood as a single-game record for several decades. Defensively, he was not tremendously mobile but was a sure-handed first baseman. He finished his career with 336 home runs and 1,122 RBI. Third baseman Jimmy Austin (1909-29) was a slick-fielding, strong-armed, enthusiastic player who was an average hitter at best in the deadball era. (Don’t let the dates fool you – his career, for all intents and purposes, ended in the early 1920s, but he remained as a coach with the St. Louis Browns and he was so popular that he would occasionally be re-activated for one game just so he could go out and take the field once a year.) For a few years during his playing career, Austin was the Browns’ “Sunday manager,” running things once a week while the devout Branch Rickey stayed home to observe the Sabbath. Second baseman Jerry Adair (1958-70) was a great fielder and a weak hitter. Shortstop Jim Anderson (1978-84) wasn’t a bad fielder, and he made Jerry Adair look like Jimmie Foxx by comparison. After the California Angels won the division title in 1979, Anderson celebrated by pouring a beer over Richard Nixon’s head. It’s not clear whether Nixon turned up in the clubhouse or whether Anderson sought him out at San Clemente to douse him.

Outfield: Left fielder Jesus Alou (1963-79) was the fourth best outfielder in his own family, behind brothers Matty and Felipe and nephew Moises. He was a .280 hitter, which sounds OK, but he didn’t draw walks, wasn’t a good baserunner and had no power. He was the first Latino ballplayer named Jesus to hit the majors, and apparently some broadcasters were afraid that his name was somehow blasphemous, so they tried referring to him as “Jay Alou,” but Jesus balked at that, pointed out that it was a common name in the Dominican, and insisted that they call him by his proper name (pronounced “Hey-ZOOS,” of course.) Center fielder Honest John Anderson (1894-1908) led the NL with 22 home runs and a .494 slugging percentage in 1898. In 1908, he led the AL with 39 stolen bases. This makes him one of five players in the 20th century to have been a league leader in both steals and home runs (along with Willie Mays, Chuck Klein, Ty Cobb and Jimmy Sheckard). He also has the distinction of being the first (and easily the best) major-leaguer born in Norway. Right fielder Jeff Abbott (1997-2001) hit .320 or so at every stop in the minors, but he never did enough in the majors to hold down a fulltime job.

Catcher: Jimmy Archer (1904-18) was a light-hitting catcher with a reputation for a strong throwing arm. He was a respected player and a member of two pennant winners.

Rotation: Johnny Antonelli (1948-61) was a lefty who bided his time as a teenaged bonus baby with the Braves and then came into his own with the New York (and later San Francisco) Giants. He won 20 games twice, led the league in ERA in 1954 and twice led the league in shutouts. He pitched masterfully in the Giants’ sweep of the 1954 World Series, beating Cleveland 3-1 in Game 2 and getting the final five outs of the decisive Game 4. Johnny Allen (1932-44) and Joaquin Andujar (1976-88) are the resident hotheads in the rotation. Allen was a very good pitcher, with a career record of 142-75. He was a temperamental Southern boy who was working as a bellhop at a hotel when he convinced legendary Yankees scout Paul Krichell to give him a tryout. He went 17-4 as a rookie, but he eventually wore out his welcome in New York. He later went 15-1 in Cleveland, setting a record for winning percentage that would stand until Roy Face took it away. His temper was so well known that opposing players would look for ways to piss him off. A favorite was complaining to the umpire that they were distracted by some item of jewelry he was wearing, or some part of his uniform – because they knew it would cause him to blow his stack and lose his composure on the mound. They used to do the same thing to Andujar, with similar results. He wasn’t quite as good as Allen, but he was good. He drove managers up the wall in Cincinnati and Houston before he finally arrived in St. Louis and Whitey Herzog essentially told him, “Act as crazy as you want, as long as you take a regular turn in the rotation and get people out.” He was the ace of the staff for the World Series champs of 1982, and he won 20 games in ’84 and ’85, but in the disastrous seventh game of the 1985 World Series, Herzog made the mistake of bringing Andujar into a situation that had already become quite volatile, and Andujar ended up going all Mount Vesuvius, charging at the plate umpire with his fists raised and getting ejected. He went to Oakland and pitched well the next year, but the decline had set in. Among other things, he was famous for his insistence that he was a great hitter (in spite of considerable evidence to the contrary) and his propensity for saying quasi-profound thing such as, “There is one word to describe baseball, and that word is ‘You never know.’ " Jim Abbott (1989-99) was born without a right hand but went on to become a successful left-handed pitcher – an All-American at Michigan, a gold medalist in the Olympics and a fine major-leaguer who won 87 games, finished third in the 1991 Cy Young voting and pitched a no-hitter. In a neat little tribute, at baseballreference.com lists him as “Bats: Left” and “Throws: Left,” then adds “Fields: Left as well.” (And, yes, it says the same thing under Pete Gray.) He actually fielded his position quite well, balancing his mitt on the stump of his right wrist and then slipping it onto his left hand during the follow-through and ending up in position to field any comebackers. Upon fielding a grounder, he would flip the ball just high enough to allow him to slip the glove off, then catch the ball and make the throw. For whatever it’s worth, Abbott had a higher lifetime fielding percentage than Jim Kaat or Greg Maddux, who won 34 Gold Gloves between them. Jack Armstrong (1988-94) had a great name for a pitcher. In 1990, he began the season 11-3 and started the all-star game for the NL. He went 1-6 the rest of the way, and then went 22-46 for the rest of his career.

Bullpen: Jack Aker (1964-74) saved 32 games for the A's in 1966, which stood as a major-league record for a few years. He had some good seasons, finished with 47 wins, 123 saves and a 3.28 ERA. John Axford (2009- ) emerged out of nowhere as the Brewers' closer in 2010 and has been very effective in that role, leading the National League with 46 saves in 2011. We'll see if he can sustain it, but if he does he could push Aker aside and claim the closer role on this team. Juan “Sasquatch” Acevedo (1995-2003) had a big year in Double-A at age 24, got marked as a hot prospect and spent the next decade failing to live up to that label, though in truth he did a fairly successful job of morphing from a disappointing starter into an occasionally effective reliever. He finished with 53 career saves. Juan Agosto (1981-93) was never a fulltime closer but always picked up a few saves here and there. He was frequently good, and when he wasn’t he was willing to work as a guy who could eat up some innings during blowout losses (earning the nickname “Juan Digusto” in some quarters). Jim Acker (1983-92) was a respectable middle reliever in Toronto and Atlanta for many years. Lefty Jerry Augustine (1975-84) came up as a starter, shifted to the bullpen and spent a decade as one of the nondescript arms in the Milwaukee Brewers’ arsenal. Jose Alvarez (1981-89) pitched briefly for Atlanta in 1981 and ’82, knocked around the minors for the next five years, and then returned to the Braves as a highly effective reliever for a couple of years at the end of the decade.

Bench: Backup catcher Joe (The Immortal) Azcue (1960-72) was billed as a “can’t miss” star, but he was actually very ordinary. Best known for his nickname, and for the fact that he sat out the 1971 season in a contract dispute and spend the year pouring concrete rather than accept the Angels’ contract offer. Joey Amalfitano (1954-67) was a light-hitting middle infielder who later managed the Cubs. Outfielder Jermaine Allensworth (1996-99) was one of those guys who looked like a really good player but really wasn’t one. Utility infielder Jose Altuve (2011- ) batted .276 and showed some speed as an Astros rookie. He doesn't get on base much, but he's young and could improve. J.P. Arencibia (2010- ), another backup catcher, hits home runs and does nothing else. He strikes out a lot, does not walk, and his career average thus far is .213. But in 478 career at-bats, he's got 25 home runs and 82 RBI, so there is some value in that.

Manager: Joe Altobelli managed the 1983 World Series champion Orioles. He will be assisted by Amalfitano, and on Sundays he will turn the team over to Jimmy Austin.